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Saunavator
For the elevator obsessives amongst us... | |
It's 17.30 at the end of a bitch of a day. Last month you would have crammed into the elevator, plummeted to the ground floor, stormed over to your car, and headed out into the rush hour traffic. Then you'd have sat fuming about your day whilst grinding your teeth at the wheel.
Thank God that your
office has installed the latest city craze, the Saunavator. Sure, it might be the slowest elevator in the building, but it's by far the best. Having foreseen a terrible afternoon, you've already booked the Saunavator, and it's already waiting for you.
As you press the 'call' button the doors immediately glide open. You walk through what had looked like normal elevator doors, until they opened, and find yourself in a warm but dry pine-clad lift. There are slatted pine benches on the three interior walls, and a faint smell of eucalyptus and warm wood hanging in the air.
As the door closes behind you, you notice that it, too, is clad in pine which glows gold in the dimmed interior light. At your leisure, you strip and place your clothes in the small watertight locker in the corner. As the locker clicks shut, the Saunavator takes it's cue, and steam begins to pour into the room, relaxing your tired mind and body. You hardly notice as it begins its (very) gentle decent.
After 15 minutes of steam (at my request) a gentle alarm sounds, telling me that we've reached the third floor, and that the next stage is about to begin. The steam is extracted through a fan in the room, and a warm shower begins from the ceiling (I chose against the invigorating cool shower option).
After a minute, the water stops and you open the waterproof locker, dry off with a warm fluffy towel, and get dressed. A dull thud tells you that you've arrived on the ground floor. The door opens as you press the appropriate button, and you walk out to your car, totally refreshed, having forgotten your bad day.
As the doors close behind you, you hear the Saunavator's hot fans blowing drying it's interior and it climbs again to the top floor.
You've missed the rush hour, too.
Too hot for the Saunavator?
http://www.halfbake...e_20Suit_20Chute_2e [Fishrat, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 05 2004]
[link]
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I like it but, won't people get even more annoyed waiting for the 15 minute a time lift? It might be a good idea to have a roller-coaster type setup, where used elevators return via a different shaft and traverse when at the top. This would give them more time to dry too. |
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I'm assuming there are maidens with birch twigs, just like in Finland? |
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[Peter] - I guess we could put a snow-pit on the ground floor for you to dive out into, as well. [silver] That's why you need to book the Saunavator in advance. However, I'm trying to think of a way of getting people in and out on each floor without losing the steam. Also, this would be an addition to a building's elevator 'fleet', so you could still use the other elevators in a hurry. |
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I like it, I like it a lot. I agree with [silverstormer] though. There's gonna be one hell of a (lift) traffic jam at 5:30 p.m. if everyone wants a go. |
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Why not set up a paternoster of saunavators then someone can get in every minute or so and begin the descent. The rising cubicles will also be going very slowly and will have plenty of time to dry out ready for the next sweaty buttonpusher. |
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[UB] Did I not mention that I'm working on the igloovator just for you? "Helping sweaty office workers chill out since 2003" |
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*jumping into line behind UnaBubba* |
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Just leave a couple of gift wrapped notes on reception, [seedy em], and I'll try to book you in before christmas. |
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[UB] I've come up with a cooling version for hot cities [link] |
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I only work on the first floor. No fair! And there's no lift anywhere in the building. |
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+ Lovely. And I wish I could give [squeak] a bun for the phrase 'paternoster of saunavators'. |
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[Fishrat] - ooh hooray - the notes from me are in the wrap with the pine trees (or are they cedar...?) and red ribbon. I await my appointment! |
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What about a button to open the door so the user can get their clothes on? |
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//After a minute, the water stops and you open the waterproof locker// ...with a button. |
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