h a l f b a k e r yIt might be better to just get another gerbil.
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//tough, inflatable bladders, capable of keeping the wearer afloat// |
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Sp.: "...keeping the rucksack afloat" |
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Tougher than you, gay boy. |
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// wait, that's not correct, what was it again? // |
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"You can walk a horse to water, but you can't make a silk... er... greener grass skirt" ? |
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You can take a Borg to water, but you cannot make it think. |
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Too many brothels spoil the chef. |
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You need this feature if you go drinking in my home town;
ie tough inflatable bladders. |
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Actually, a last-ditch flotation aid for a real tough guy would just be a small compressed air cylinder and a hypodermic needle. There are several sites on the body where large embolisms are not life-threatening yet can still provide valuable flotation. |
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And if chased by a bear ? Can I run faster than this rucksack ? |
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Shoulder straps alone will allow the rucksack to float off of the body of the semiconscious wearer, who slumps down and disappears into the shadowy depths. Thus implicit in this idea is the strap running down between the legs of the wearer and up the back. Said strap will be kept cinched tight at all times, to be sure. |
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The strap will also ensure that the wearer can walk the walk. A very special walk. |
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Don't count your castles in the air before they're
hatched, and don't lock the stable door after you
lead your gift horse to water |
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Hippo, I hope you are properly slurring your speech and gesturing with the mostly empty bottle as you say that. You may bang the table with your free hand for emphasis, or if the two of me decline to overlap. |
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Indeed [bungston], most perspicacious of you |
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The Halfbakery: 10% exasperation, 90% perspication. |
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<pushes another full bottle across the table to [hippo]> |
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// the strap running down between the legs of the wearer and up the back // |
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No, it comes with an adjustable waist-belt. The other design is only available in a plain brown wrapper to sick, twisted perverts (such as [bungston], who has a credit account, and gets the glossy catalog twice a year for free because of the sheer volume of purchases). |
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// here are several sites on the body where large embolisms are not life-threatening yet can still provide valuable flotation. // |
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No further information is required on that particular topic, thankyou. |
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I wonder when life jackets came into use. I am certain people have been falling overboard for a long time. Individually each for a very short time, but the phenomenon has existed for a long time. |
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I think they originated in the Stone Age, although obviously they've been improved quite a lot since then. |
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Actually, the first ones were made in the Wood Age, before your species discovered stone. |
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Ah, those were the good old days. Before stone, all we had was dirt, and it was good enough for everybody. |
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Then some damn fool weaponized a rock, and next thing you know there were laws restricting ownership, and you had to carry your rock in plain sight or register it. I made a lot of meat selling rock permits. (link) |
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