h a l f b a k e r yMy hatstand runneth over
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Start with the image of a greyhound racing track. Make the oval bigger. Make the traps bigger. Replace the 'rabbit' with a 'carrot'. Train horses that like to run, but don't like carrying jockeys to chase the 'carrot'.
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Horses, being herbivores, don't have to pursue their prey to eat. The grass doesn't run from them so training them to "chase" a carrot would be difficult. |
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However, as they are animals of prey, training them to run from something in pursuit of them would not be difficult. Perhaps a stuffed Mountain Lion with the correct scents and sound effects would suffice. |
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but the riderless horse in a standard race always seems to continue to run. What's the incentive there? Maybe horses just like running in which case [st3f] has an idea. |
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I, for one, would enjoy a herd (is it a herd of horses?) of horses fleeing from a stuffed mountain lion complete with computer generated 'roars'. I would be roaring with laughter. |
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I think wild horses like running in
groups - which wouldn't make for
a very exciting race. |
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I've always wondered why live horses aren't that sticky. Think of the money you'd save on saddles. And horseboxes - you could just stick them to the side of a van. |
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Can we race jockeys without horses instead? |
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Today I watched sheep race over jumps, to the sound of bagpipes. They had been taught that at the end of the race there would be buckets of grain waiting, so they raced their daggy little numbered bottoms off. |
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I think this could work for horses too, as mine will come galloping from out of sight at the sound of a banging bucket, but the risk of injury would be far too great, as they would most likely be trying to meet eachother, which involves a lot of squealing and throwing of hooves, flirt, which involves deep snorts, prancing and smelling of knees, and establish some sort of pecking order on the way, which could involve all of the above. |
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quite right, Helium, dangerous business. I love the idea of a rabbit race. a greyhound in pursuit and a fast-moving carrot leading the way.. |
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All you need is a giggling baby and you'd have the theme to Teletubbies. |
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I'll have to try Greyhound instead of Turkey on Thanksgiving. |
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The jockeys should have to carry Shetland ponies to make it fair. |
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Horses in general usually want to be first, second, or anyplace else. |
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I've owned mounts that wanted to be second, a great thing. I've ridden mounts that wanted to be first, either a great or a terrifying thing, depending on the horse and your (my) skill level. |
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[UnaBubba], get your ass back in here. |
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[norm] this idea's about horse racing, not ass racing. |
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//training them to "chase" a carrot would be difficult. // |
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I dispute that. Horses are fairly intelligent creatures, and are competitive with or without humans immediately present to encourage them. Especially if bred for the purpose. |
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// Horses are fairly intelligent creatures // |
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"fairly intelligent" on what scale ? Yes, intelligent when compared to, for example, lichen; not so clever when the competition is something a little more capable, like maybe an earthworm. |
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Horses ? You do mean the half-tonne lump of muscle and bone that idiot humans nail chunks of metal to, don't you ? Not some other form of quadruped ? |
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Horses seem to use about 99% of their mental capacity on tasks like eating, breathing, producing more horses (given the opportunity) and also amazing quantities of excrement. Which some poor daft sod has to shovel up barrow away. The other 1% is kept for Doing Really Stupid Things like jumping over a 2 metre hedge when a bit of coloured paper blows past and startles them. |
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Human repairing fixtures in loose box with power drill, saw, hammer and screwdrivers ? Ideal opportunity to poke huge hairy nose in the way to watch the action, then go to sleep in the most inconvenient spot possible. Small bird flies up out of grass ? Utter panic ... |
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They have no sense. Just watch a horse race where some of them have shed their riders over the jumps ... the horses go on running because they're a herd animal. Some of them even still jump the fences because that's what all the others are doing. They even let humans sit on them. How stupid is that ? |
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[UnaBubba], get your ass back in here.
— normzone, Oct 16 2007 |
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[norm] this idea's about horse racing, not ass racing.
— hippo, Oct 16 2007 |
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This kind of classic interchange is why I keep coming back to
the asylum, year after year. Decade after decade. (Wow,
that's a long time.) |
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