Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
h a l f b a k e r y
Yeah, I wish it made more sense too.

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Presicktive texting

 "Boss, I don't feel so good ..."
 
(+1, -1) 		  [vote for,
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With this timesaving app, when you key in " I " you are immediately offered a dropdown menu including choices including

have a fever of 102
can't keep anything down
am going to have to call out today

—normzone, Nov 21 2018

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       Does it offer a choice of horrid coughs?
—RayfordSteele, Nov 21 2018
   

       In The Good Old Days, before email and mobile phones, the wily workshy could adopt the strategem of writing a fax to the office before retiring to bed, then putting it on the home fax machine on "delayed transmit".   

       Thus the PHB would arrive in the office and find a fax, genuinely timestamped "0351 hrs", on his desk, and read "Sorry, but I'm having an [asthma attack/bout of bad toothache/episode of sickness and/or diahorrea]* and I'm going to the [Accident and Emergency/dentist first thing tomorow/bathroom every ten minutes]* - I'll be in touch as soon as I can".   

       *delete where not applicable
—8th of 7, Nov 21 2018
   

       Isn't it simpler just to *be* the boss?
—MaxwellBuchanan, Nov 21 2018
   

       ^ Then you never get a sick day.   


 

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