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A physical exercise and fitness system based on the day to day activities of pirates.
Rather than bending, stretching, deep breathing and exhalation, carried out in a gymansium-type environemnt, Pirates is taught on board a small square-rigged sailing ship. Activities include climbing up the rigging,
clewing up the main'sl, running the guns in and out, walking the plank, and digging in sand on deserted (or desert) islands to create places to conceal treasure.
Unlike the pale, weedy adherents of Pilates, those following the teaching of Pirates are sturdy, sun-bronzed hearties, sound of wind and limb, and liable to be shot on sight by the Royal Navy.
Here's your business model for your gym memberships
Multilevel_20Marketing_20Piracy
[normzone, Apr 14 2010]
Supermarket_20Pirates
See my Dec 19 2004 anno... [hippo, Apr 14 2010]
Reminds me of this...
http://www.youtube....watch?v=1oDTNEEu3Rw
Nice bit of rural/natural training - all with a classic 80s soundtrack. [Jinbish, Apr 15 2010]
Haggis Flood
http://books.google...v=onepage&q&f=false
[pocmloc, Apr 18 2010]
[link]
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Arrggh. You forgot me favorite one: pushing around barrels of rum! [+] |
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Arr there swimswim, yer rum barrel is rolling a mite light! Be you needing a keelhauling exfoliation treatment? |
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I be lookin for'ard to tunin up me physic! |
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Presumably we are all in training for a new brand of Royal Tournament? Royal Navy vs Amateurs!? Assume two parallel galleons and then proceed in competing boarding excercises. |
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Aside: I thought this idea would be about Iron Pyrites... |
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"The pack on my back is aching,
the straps seem to cut me like a knife"...
<apols to the Stone Roses> |
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Is there frigging in the rigging? (aside - I have a separate idea called: The Pontius Pilates Finger Bowl Exercise System, but won't bother posting it now - the annotation explains most of it) |
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We suggest you wash your hands of the whole idea. |
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Why...under me buck'nhat o'course. |
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Won't the hooks pop the excersize balls? |
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"Aye, it's driving me nuts!" |
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//sturdy, sun-bronzed ... sound of wind and limb// except
the ones with hooks, wooden legs, eyepatches.... |
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Yes, the ones nicknamed Lucky... |
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Like my Manly Gym idea but with a nautical rather than lumberjack theme. |
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I can also see a place in this regime for RIB driving and AK strip down and rebuild |
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As I understand it, the main day to day activities of pirates were sitting around being bored, getting drunk, getting into fights and getting hanged. |
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Sounds like my kind of excercise programme. |
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How can I not bun this? Excellent idea. |
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Cannonballs could replace medicine balls. |
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<silence>
.
.
.
<slow handclaps> |
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I was in the bookstore the other day and saw a new release in a series about undead swashbucklers called "Vampirates"... thanks to this post my thoughts wandered off in a totally different direction. |
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And on another subject, would a series of t-shirts bearing the likenesses of Charles Lindbergh, Amelia Earhart, Chuck Yeager, etc. be rightfully called Pilot-tees? |
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<Sorry! It's past my bedtime...> |
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And a pastry case filled with milky coffee could be a pie latté. |
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I like the pie and coffee idea and it's dinner time. This can only lead to one thing... Beef and onion pie latté. Will report in an hour:O) |
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In the end it was beef and mushroom pie latté. Espresso poured into a hole in the centre and left for 5 minutes as it cooled. Not too sure it's a winner... |
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Well if you used espresso what do you expect? [+] for the attempt though. |
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All of the weights should be made from fool's gold. |
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"[morrison_rm] has left the building ...." |
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Indeed. "Pirates of Punzance" |
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Of course it had to be espresso. A regular coffee would have poured off the plate... Causing bits of pie to float all over the table. Not good. Not good at all! |
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[pocmloc] Erudition, yes, I expect that around here but ...
how the *hell* did you come up with that? |
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Ni hansa, O squeaky one, I looked it up on goggle bocks. |
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[saedi], you misunderstand - it is a defining feature of a latté that it is very milky, and a similarly defining feature of an espresso that it is not. Hence my suspicion that substitution would disappoint. |
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Would an espresso latté just be a cappuccino? |
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<rushes off to fetch shotgun> |
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You're right. I fail. There was no milk in it. However, not a chance I'm tipping any more coffee on a pie. So whether it's good or not will have to remain a mystery now. |
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This is not a lucrative business. If we lobbied together as the Equivoquologists Union, we could maybe secure an increase in the pay rates of pun science. |
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what about us? we need payrises in the feild of bun science [+] |
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The angry pirate - a deviant sexual practice that leaves the woman hopping on one foot and covering one eye with her hand. Prehaps you could incorporate this into the work out? |
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// This is not a lucrative business. // |
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We are minded to dispute that; once you have a sufficient number of rum-addicted hearties practised in the arts of shinning up ropes, heaving to, and other piratical activities, the opportunites in the waters of the Somali coast are ripe for exploitation. |
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God I miss 8th. Love his reaction to "Medicine balls would be replaced with cannon balls." |
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This would be fun as hell. |
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You'll never read the word "pirates" the same again. |
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