Phantom Commercials

It seems whenever I get a chance to watch the telly, during the commercial breaks, some banal new drama program is being advertised that I will never have the misfortune of watching. It occured to me that many of these programs may not actually exist - they are merely fanciful attempts into lulling me into a safe sense of security that the channel I am currently watching has in fact an interesting and varied selection of shows.

For a television station that cannot afford some of the expensive high rating pap, money can be spent wisely on shooting a series of commercials for non existent programs.

'Sheena was a no-good girl from the wrong side of the tracks - until she met Bob - and things turned from hot - to hotter.' 'Nordstrom's Crossing tuesdays at eight'

If a viewer remembers to tune in at eight, the program never actually airs and no record of it is found in any of the television guides. Nordstrom's Crossing is never heard of again, but the ad is replaced with another series of phantom commercials equally as banal.