Perfect poop pill

We are colonial organisms (no pun intended) composed of a single large vertebrate carrying a teeming and complex colonic ecosystem. A constant dialogue of secreted products, inflammatory mediators and metabolic products goes on between colonic inhabitants and the rest of the body. Medicine treats this colonial organism in a manner reminiscent of American foreign policy – dropping antibiotic “bombs” to remedy any number of problems, often with drastic consequences on the innocent bystanders in our colons. New, more malicious microbes can move in, taking the spaces once occupied by our murdered commensals. The resulting problems are addressed with more bombs.

I propose an enteric-coated tablet containing dried, live cultures of the many microbial inhabitants of the healthy colon. The proportions of each bacterium type would be derived through careful research, much as the correct blend of grapes in a fine wine. It would become routine for every doctor, when prescribing antibiotics, to also prescribe the “perfect poop pill” to restore and maintain a healthy ecosystem. These pills could also be popped in the mouths of newborn babies – born without any colonic flora, many probably become colicky as a result of undesirable random bacteria taking up residence. Instead of waiting for time to restore balance, why not get it right from the start?

It may be that antibiotic-influenced shifts in the fecal flora are only the most blatant of troubles caused by disordered colons. Consider – change in diet, geography, hormones or any number of factors might alter colonic flora for the worse. Even more interesting – it is likely that the desirable colonic inhibtants differ from person to person. Research may find different pills for different individuals: pregnant women, old men, hard working students and indigent loafers would each have their own perfect poop pill.