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Ouija Doormat

 W-E-L-C-O-M-E
  (+1)
(+1) 		  [vote for,
against]

Sensor + Approaching visitor/Door-to-door Evangelist =
Ouija Welcome Mat activation.
Upon activation, magnetic planchette hovers above Ouija Welcome Mat - spelling WELCOME.
IF "guest" remains, questions from beyond the door are answered through the homeowner's actions of punching in replies, then "Yes."
Sample replies:
"I'm not interested"
"Go away"
—thumbwax, Sep 19 2003

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       c*r*o*i*s*s*a*n*t
—po, Sep 19 2003
   

       what if the visitor is illiterate? Lots of those around here.
—Pericles, Sep 19 2003
   

       // Approaching visitor/Door-to-door Evangelist //   

       Why do you have to divide the visitor by the evangelist? How do you divide people by each other anyway? I know how to divide people (using a big knive or ax), but I don't think that's the point here.
—kbecker, Sep 19 2003
   

       Can I get one that transforms into a flaming pit?
—DrCurry, Sep 19 2003
   

       The flaming pit is nice touch. I wonder if a large LCD screen on the door would work, full door height and width. As the bell rings the plain brown door turns into a flaming inferno and hidden speakers play hellish laughter mixed with screams of agony and horror.   

       Other scenes good for a laugh:
The screen plays a video of the door opening with a voice "Hey just come in, I'm in the kitchen". Watch them bump into the door as they try to enter.
On Halloween a little flap opens (video again). A zombi stares out and grunts something like "ahh, food come".
—kbecker, Sep 19 2003
   

       Oh, man - kbecker - you should post that one.
—thumbwax, Sep 20 2003
   

       Of course, I voted 'yes'. But I am concerned that once I installed my Ouija doormat, a line of shuffling, grovelling petitioners would form an advice line on my front porch. I've met people who would stand for hours inquiring after the health of their pets, their chances of finding a mate, and the winning team for the Superbowl. But kbecker's LCD screen would probably be helpful in getting these folks to move along.
—BeeBee, Sep 20 2003
   

       I thought this would shift the visitor around to spell out "N.O.O.N.E.H.O.M.E" and "C.O.M.E.B.A.C.K.L.A.T.E.R"   

       Now I bet *that* would run off unwated visitors...
—little dog laughed, Sep 21 2003
   


 

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