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Problems getting up, constantly late for work, can't stop hitting the snooze button, well try the Oral Sex Alarm Clock.
Guaranteed to encourage you to get you out of bed and have a great day.
Why does sex make men sleepy?
http://www.straight...lassics/a5_183.html An inconclusive "it doesn't". [pottedstu, Dec 05 2001, last modified Oct 21 2004]
(?) Goblin teasmade
http://www.teasmade.com/index.htm For those desperate for a hobby. [DrBob, Dec 05 2001, last modified Oct 21 2004]
The "Snoregasm" alarm clock
http://www.buzzfeed...noregasm-clock-281t Baked! - sort of. [hippo, Nov 18 2011]
[link]
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Um, so this is like, well, what is it exactly? A small watch you wear on your, er, well, not your wrist. . . . |
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Ah, but the flood of oxytocin after the oral sex (if you're male, that is) would result in feelings of drowsy bliss, causing you to immediately roll over and go back to sleep. Which is, incidentally, why men often fit the stereotype of not wanting conversation after sex. Cigarette then sleep. It's a biological imperative. (OK, maybe not the cigarette bit.) |
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oh. most of mine want it once or twice more before going to sleep. |
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I wouldn't fancy cleaning it after it had been used a few times. |
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Only someone very, very single would buy such an alarm. |
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According to the Straight Dope, sex doesn't make you sleepy. (He does, however acknowledge flaws in the experiments, which involved inserting large metal probes in the subjects' anuses to measure the intensity of their orgasms, which may not have been conducive to relaxation.) |
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I don't think it makes you sleepy; I think it makes you stop wanting sex for a while. I think the desire for sleep stems from the fact that a lot of activity in this field happens after hours; it's not that they suddenly became sleepy, it's that they've suddenly lost a relatively important reason to stay awake. |
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we call it a full stop, people may have missed your meaning, bliss |
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Well she does seem kind of wound up. |
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Does anyone remember that joke about Goblin Teasmaids? Whatever happened to them (the teasmaids, not jokes) I wonder? |
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Gordon, see link for all the answers to your teasmade questions. |
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Oral Sex Alarm Clock . . . hmmmm. . .
Given that illegality is never a barrier to ideas here, why not just hire a prostitute on a daily basis? Granted, it would get expensive, but if you, um, "get up" in the mornings, you would be in the profession's off-peak hours and might get a discount rate. |
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Heh, "clock rings." Nice, [UB]. |
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This idea was half-baked in a slightly different form, although I think the author has deleted it. If I remember correctly though, that version worked on the prostate... Not quite so messy, but still, daunting when you think of how it must be applied. |
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When I saw 'idea' title, I assumed benfrost was Author. |
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Fishboned? How strange! Two different models would be available, one for each gender. Speaking for myself, this would make me leap out of bed in a great mood to face the world. |
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is aural sex - talking about it? |
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An alarm clock? Why wait till morning and would be you be able to sleep the night before waiting for it to go off. |
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"why are you setting your alarm clock for 4am dear?" |
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would need about a 20 minutes snooze setting. [blissmiss], task at hand is a whole different method. |
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This idea makes me think of gnashing, sharp-pronged
steel jaws malfunctioning and munching off one's
todger first thing in the morning, but maybe that's
just me. I think the threat of oral sex would get me
out of bed pronto. |
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I think the mess makes me want to get out of bed
more than anything. How about a clock that shoots
goo at you, thus compelling you to get up and
shower? |
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(Obligatory) Baked - your mother! |
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Coincidentally, I yesterday saw an episode of River Monsters, featuring a fish that was performing extra rough rough trade on (male) swimmers. The fish have bizarrely human looking - and feeling, apparently - teeth. |
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