Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
h a l f b a k e r y
The phrase 'crumpled heap' comes to mind.

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Ocean Sex Suit

Floating body sleeve so partners can rock out in the ocean.
  (+12, -2)(+12, -2)
(+12, -2)
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So, you're at the beach with that special person, limbs tangled betwixt crumbled blankets and sandy wine glasses, the passion has stirred. The waves beckon for those bodies to fuse along the surging tide, the swaying of nature yearns to cradle her creatures of love...

"Nah, baby, that salt water always gets to hurtin' afterwards..."

Hurt no more! And rock with her to the tune of earthen water pulled by moon. Slip into this funny body sock and run, together, hand in hand, towards the abyss of insatiable desire; you have purchased the Ocean Sex Suit.

The Ocean Sex Suit is an extra-large innertube with a contoured insert of the thinnest strongest rubber composites for two bodies to float together, in full contact with eachother, and no contact directly with the water. However, the rubber allows much tactile sensation to transfer between turbulent water and laminar flesh. Flexible rubber design allows for multi-position usage ranging from full mercenary to the advanced congress of the cow.

Ocean. Sex. Suit.

daseva, Jun 13 2005

Ethnotica Ethnotica
Justification: "abyss of insatiable desire" and "The waves beckon for those bodies to fuse along the surging tide, the swaying of nature yearns to cradle her creatures of love..." otherwise, it's entirely shameless elf promotion. [zen_tom, Jun 13 2005]

Hmmm, I'm thinking orgy. Multi_20Diving
"Everybody in! Last one in has to push us out to sea!" [k_sra, Jun 13 2005]

[link]






       Tip in a couple a litres of lube before you set sail. And don't forget to tie a paddle on before you go.
wagster, Jun 13 2005
  

       Kind of like a Super-XXX-XXXL wetsuit? I think I'm going to give this a bun, but only because it gives me a tenuous excuse to link to Ethnotica.
zen_tom, Jun 13 2005
  

       oh, the old waves crashing on the beach metaphor, eh?
po, Jun 13 2005
  

       [po], it has not the slightest effect? :(   

       Today's my birthday. :)
daseva, Jun 13 2005
  

       Happy birthday, [das]! Oh, and a bun for your idea.
Machiavelli, Jun 13 2005
  

       Ocean, sex, suit, three of my most favourite words, now how did you manage to make such a bad idea out of it? Don't like it.   

       But I do like to wish you a very happy birthday and many more to come!
zeno, Jun 13 2005
  

       It sounds like slithering into an enormous condom. Bun? What the hell...
elhigh, Jun 13 2005
  

       Of course, [EDJ]...   

       Enormous condom? yeah. Mabey even have a built in condom sleeve.
daseva, Jun 13 2005
  

       Shark attack.
omegatron, Jun 14 2005
  

       I want the version that lets me do the White Lotus.
WhereYouAt, Jul 22 2008
  
      
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