h a l f b a k e r yFewer ducks than estimates indicate.
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Sensors in the handlebars, seat cushion, and pedals indicate the presence of a rider and signal the control rod drive mechanism (CRDM) in the bicycle seat springs to activate. A handy thermostat near the handlebar grips allow the rider to select the desired temperature by metering the CRDM. A compact
pump in the pedal bearing housing circulates the reactor coolant throughout the frame, including the handlebars. After 87 years of faithful service, simply swap out the plutonium-238 in the bicycle seat, and you (or more likely, your heirs) will be ready for more biking fun.
As a bonus feature, a smoke detector is included at no extra charge which will alarm loudly should it detect that your Speedo Bike Shorts have somehow caught fire.
Not even vaguely related...
Bicycle_20Seat_20Shorts [normzone, Dec 16 2012]
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Annotation:
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Pu-238 isn't fissile
we sense a
misunderstanding on your part as to the
physics of radiothermoelectric generators,
which aren't reactors and don't have control
rods. |
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Also, placing the isotope package in the
bicycle seat will (unless massively shielded)
rapidly ensure that you have no further
offspring, and shortly thereafter leave any
you already have gleefully contemplating
how much they've just inherited. |
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You can't change the output of such a
generator, which is maximal at the time of
manufacture and steadily decays over time.
That's why they're used to cover the baseload
for satellites and deep-space probes, when
photovoltaics may deliver intermittent (but
predictable) output. Batteries are usually
used to cover surges in load, like when the
main transmitter is active. Under low load
conditions, surplus energy has to be
dissipated by a simple resistive radiator. |
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Bun for a design potentially lethal to cyclists. |
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//likely, your heirs// unlikely; and yet more unlikely that if they exist, they'd be of a bicycle-fitting shape |
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Can we have a new [MFD] for "nuclear powered everything"? I've got one: a nuclear powered toaster. No, nuclear powered TV! Nuclear powered Christmas tree lights? |
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I read this as an actual reactor [8th], not an RTG. |
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Because Pu-238 isn't fissile by slow neutrons, but it is used in RTGs. Unless the proposal is for a bicycle-mounted FBR, which would be ... interesting. |
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Start with a nuclear powered LED. |
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Ironically, an everlasting light source based
on radioactive material and phosphor is
probably quite practical
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//Ironically, an everlasting light source based on radioactive material and phosphor is probably quite practical// |
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That's why it's quite baked, and I have one on my car keys. It isn't exactly "everlasting" but it will glow for 12-20 years. |
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