h a l f b a k e r yBusiness Failure Incubator
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For more fun, read aloud: Move or
not move lips accordingly!
The can tops you throw out are
sharp. I see a solution to the ninja in
the field or at home.
This electric can-opener is seemingly
normal. However, this ninja can-
opener does not move the can
around in a regular circle,
but back
and forth with a swivel blade to make
a ninja star, every time.
For the ninja in the field, this
throwing star has a broader blade
after the sharp points. Perfect for
opening heavy steel cans. Never run
out of stars again!
Enjoy this tasty meal that was
prepared for you. It could be your
last!
[link]
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Aww, where's [deathninja] for this one? |
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I was thinking he would love this. |
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death been missing for ages.. |
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I seem to recall that those old fashioned manual tin openers that were little more than a spike with a hooked blade created pretty lethal edges. |
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I remember [dn] from the ages long before my first posts ... I really enjoyed his comedic stylings |
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I haven't seen [dn] for a while. Hope (s)he's ok. I say (s)he, but I'm fairly sure (s)he's a he. |
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The opener will need some way of knowing what the diameter of the lid is to make it come out even. |
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Good one, [sartep]. (+). Perhaps this will rouse [death], I also miss his/her ideas and annos. |
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It could make an incision in the
can and go completely around
until it finds the incision again.
Then an onboard computer would
calculate the size of the blades.
That good, Phoenix? |
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(+) but what if it makes the ninja star, then compleatly cuts off the top so I don't have to reach around the sharp points left to get that last diced tomato that got caught. |
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You then reach in there and take
the tomatoes out, problems of
your flesh shall not taint your
mind. |
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Or you can put it in that can
opener that cuts neatly around the
outside and doesn't make a sharp
edge. |
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so this isn't a can opener, it's a ninja star maker. |
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Is the can opened or closed after
using this item? |
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Even if another device were to
make a small opening in the can it
could be called a can opener. |
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Schroedinger's Can Opener would
be perfect for opening that can of
Uranium Kitten Gun mix. And as
soon as you open the can you find
out if it is fresh kitten or dead
kitten. |
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This is a pretty good idea. If I may add something. You could have the divice open the can normaly, then have it use a cookie cutter like device to punch out the ninja star, much like the U.S. mint works, sorta like a cookie cutter. Cans are pretty thin so if you had a big enough lever applying the force or just use a high amount of reduction gears, it shouldn't be a problem. I'd buy one no doubt. you got a + |
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Can you change it to cut out the Star of David or the Sar of Bethlehem to spice up the holiday season? Hang them on your Christmas Tree, or the Menorah, not in that order. |
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(For the sake of brevity, the other 3823 (or was it 3824) religious symbols are not mentioned.) |
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I cut off my tongue licking the lid before flinging it at my assailant. I shall be ok as my voice is being dubbed (badly) and I have no need for my tongue to speak. |
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Ah yes thelambs, very good.
However, you forget that only an
electric can opener can make tiny
micro hooking spikes to rip flesh
on a painful level. Your cookie
cutter is not a bad idea, you can
punch a whole in the center to add
a throwing weight disc and more
force to your blades. |
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Epimenides, cut out seasonal stars
from seasoning cans to give
seasons greetings enemies will not
soon forget? Hmmm, not bad. |
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Captain Ignorant, only cut off your
tongue to spit blood in the eye of
your nemesis. |
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Honorable, UnaBubba. I invite you
to fight me while I serve you a
tasty snack of death! As you see
behind me,
these are not nachos, they are
poison tipped stars. |
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"So you're not afraid of death then. Right!"
<throws star dripping with creamed corn> |
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If this device left behind an opened can with a star-shaped hole in the top then it would be ideal for beheading seagulls when the can finally makes it to the tip. I'm for the variations which remove the unused bits of sharp tin-top. |
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Curses! He's using the creamed corn! |
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For some insane reason, I actually tried this. I couldn't adapt a can opener, so I just made ninja stars with can lids. Turns out they're too thin, making them weak and unstable compared to the real thing (that's why can openers work so easily). Still, my buddy and I managed to strike each other a few times from a distance. I now have a really long scar on my unarmoured stomach and a few stab wounds. Beware my close-range projectiles(oxymoron?). Hope [dn] gets his/her account back, I liked his/her personality and humor. (+) |
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*sniff* I just realised that this is the idea that brought me to the 1/2b. I was doing a random google on shuriken and saw a link that said " Ninja Star Can-Opener" and had to have a look. |
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I haven't been the same since. |
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