h a l f b a k e r yI never imagined it would be edible.
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To a mum, no injury is life-threatening. 40% burns? Break out the Savlon. Sleeping-pill overdose? Half a pint of cod liver oil, then make 'em wash all the ambulances to keep 'em awake. Profuse bleeding from a dog attack? More Savlon, and the big plaster from the Elastoplast variety pack. Cranial trauma?
Ice in a tea towel applied to the wound, and a quarter of chocolate mice.
[Suggested category - Health: Hospital]
[link]
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Would there also be stern lectures about the dangers of playing with matches/pills/dogs/cranial traumatisers? |
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That's where Dad comes in. |
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Tighten your belt another notch, and put bicycle clips round your ankles, Sleepygrass. |
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I know where there are plenty of rat's asses awaiting transplant patients. Seems you can't give them away these days. |
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Questions asked by A&E mums: |
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1) Are you allergic to any medication?
2) Did you think it was clever?
3) And if your friend jumped off a cliff, would you copy him then? |
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4. don't come running to me when you break your leg |
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So, after what [IVni] said, is this baked? Because I don't care if it is, it still gets my croissant. And a chocolate biscuit. |
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5) So, you had to learn the hard way. |
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<spits on hanky and wipes patients face> "there all better, now" |
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"I'll give you something to cry
about" instead of "The doctor will
see you now" |
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6) And you can pick up ALL those
fingers before you come crying to me,
young man. |
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"A quarter of chocolate mice"???????? What??? |
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A 4 oz. bag of sweets, made of chocolate (the sweets, not the bag), shaped like little mice (again - the sweets, not the bag). The mainstay of my confectionary youth. |
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(Yes, confectionary with an A. Confectionery, being a noun, is unsuitable for use as a qualifying adjective. No idea if it's a real word though.) |
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The best we have are gummy rats. |
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