h a l f b a k e r yThe embarrassing drunkard uncle of invention.
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Orchestra conductors flail and point, grimacing and
gurning, swaying and leaning. Really they are doing a little
interpretive dance, confined to the podium.
I propose that the role of conductor be expanded by
stretching the podium out, and possibly into the orchestra
via catwalks. The conductor
can now get his or her feet
into it - jumping, running, rolling and kicking feet in the
air, and doing all the dancy things previously impossible on
the confines of the podium.
Another alternative might be to strap the conductor in a
harness to allow him to jump and fly over his performers,
the better to emphasize and connote how the music is
supposed to be.
[link]
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The score is going to have to follow the maestro around somehow. |
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What about putting the conductor in one of those skydiving simulators ? They have transparent walls, so the musicians can see the baton ... the score could be on a HUD display in the helmet visor ? |
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I love this. My now deceased brother-in-law was a conductor.
A brilliant man, and very kind in nature, by the way.
I would have enjoyed seeing him making his way thru the
woodwinds, yelling "louder, louder, louder, you ass", whilst
slapping them with his baton. Bravo [bungston], bravo. |
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A semiconductor you mean? |
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[blissy] you crack me up! |
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// seeing him making his way thru the woodwinds, yelling "louder, louder, louder, you ass", whilst slapping them with his baton. // |
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<Ponders on mental image of conductor, in top hat, red coat and riding boots and britches, wielding chair and whip, facing down a particularly combative bassoonist> |
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Strangely enough, my late nephew Theophalt was an excellent conductor. Of course he only found out during that thunderstorm. |
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//Of course he only found out during that thunderstorm.// |
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As a certain renowned Baker tells us, 'resistance is useless.' |
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Ahem, "Resistance is Futile" ... |
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Can the orchestra create a new score on the fly? A work
initiated by conductor movement of a enjoyed score, via
the feeling, skill and knowledge of orchestral musicians. |
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The motion of slapping woodwinds would definitely be in
the percussion section's hands. |
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