Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Mattress Crawling

for spelunkers and itchy backs
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After overwhelming success with our chain of pet sex change clinics, we’ve branched out into franchise hotels with a distinctive feature, mattress crawling. Our guests will find sleeping or relaxing on our unique inflated beds with fingers-like surface, to be quite soothing and restful.

At any time they may choose to go to one of our anterooms and, via an airlock, crawl into one of the other air mattresses to partake in casual massage or tickling.

Rather have a water bed? We have those too, with water jet massage. Crawlers, simply don a facemask, regulator and hose and enter a bed via an anteroom hot tub.

FarmerJohn, Mar 03 2004

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       There are some very odd people out there. Is this the sort of thing farmers do in the winter?
unclepete, Mar 03 2004
  

       Well pete, you know when the cow's in the meadow and the sheep's in the corn.
FarmerJohn, Mar 03 2004
  

       //Flatulation tank//   

       Sounds painful...
Detly, Mar 03 2004
  

       Eeew - One serving per customer, I hope. Is that bacon I smell?
Letsbuildafort, Mar 03 2004
  
      
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