h a l f b a k e r yFewer ducks than estimates indicate.
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This is a bell shaped masturbatory vibrator attached to an
accelerator that is then hooked up to software that trains the
user
with eye tracking -- a series of photos of faces could be crowd-
source marked as to how different types of people either make
or
avoid eye contact and then the user
could be gently encouraged
to
behave in either more or less autistic ways according to the
crowd-
sourced data, according to the path their gaze follows around
the screen.
[link]
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So, it's a form of Pavlovian training, and it relies on the assumption that rules for recognizing appropriate eye-movement can be derived from crowd-sourced photos? |
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I think the main problem with this is that the photos would lack sufficient context. |
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That is to say, correct eye-contact between two people is to some extent a function of the history between those two people, and that history is unlikely to be captured from these crowd-sourced photos in a way that translates into the right wank-strokes. |
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Similarly, correct (that is, normally accepted) eye-contact is also to some extent a function of relationships with third parties out of shot. |
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I think this should be adopted for our politicians.
Whenever they refrain from saying stupid things like
"Let's send a message to those fat cats in
Washington" or "I don't work for Wall Street, I work
for main street" they get their junk tickled. Then,
when they say stuff like the above, give them a mild
electric shock. About 2000 volts at 5 amps should do
it. |
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Operantly condition people to do X. Meh. But this
version has an above-average likelihood of amusing
unintended consequences. |
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[pertinax] Not Pavlovian -- that's stimulus/response,
not positive/negative reinforcement. If you want an
eponym, it's Skinnerian. |
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So it encourages learning social cues, but makes
you addicted to masturbating under the eyes of
strangers? hmm.. |
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Can I get one if I'm not autistic? |
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I don't think sexually meddling with boys is going to help them necessarily achieve the goal of improving their social skills. |
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Ah. Thank you, [mouseposture]. |
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Personally, I we should make eye contact less. |
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Don't come to Maine, then. We all make eye contact with
each other when we pass, just to say hi. Sometimes folks
from away get weirded out by so many people looking at
them for no apparent reason. |
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You don't often see Mainers masturbating in public,
however, and on the rare occasion that you do, they're
pretty focused on what they're doing. |
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This sounds like something designed to condition
people to want to masturbate in
social situations. |
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About eye contact during masturbation, is it? I find it extremely annoying to get it in my eyes. However, this was a strategy employed by Colonel William Prescott during the Revolutionary War, at the Battle of Bunker Hill, where he ordered, "...Don't fire until you see the whites of their eyes..." because he knew they had limited... uh... oh dear, that was something else --- nevermind. Carry on. (You! In the corner near the hydrangeas! Please aim elsewhere!) |
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