h a l f b a k e r yWe have a low common denominator: 2
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Manufacture a liquid containing a highly luminous substance as found in bioluminescent organisms which can either be drunk or administered as an enema that leads to sufficiently luminous innards to be visible from outside the body. This would be not only entertaining, but would also provide a less hazardous
alternative to a barium enema, which uses very strong X-rays.
Also, it could save electricity because you wouldn't need to have the lights on as much.
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"leads to sufficiently luminous innards
to be visible from outside the body" |
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Given that we're not particularly
transparent to visible wavelengths of
light I'm guessing that you're going to
have to swallow something not only
really nasty but so far beyond our
technology that it's looking like magic
from here. |
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Stand in front of the strongest floodlight you can find, and see how much light comes through. |
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The floodlight has to penetrate through a whole body to be visible, but this would only have to penetrate the layers between the organ concerned and the surface. It is actually possible to transilluminate parts of the body from within, such as facial sinuses. There are circus acts where people swallow fluorescent tubes which are then visible from outside. Also, after some time spent in total darkness, the eyes become much more sensitive, to the extent that just a few photons are visible. Moreover, on the medical imaging side, it needn't be a human eye detecting the light, but a more sensitive device. So far as the substance required is concerned, there are animals living deep in the oceans that use opaque pigments to disguise the luminous contents of their prey in their bodies.
However, suppose it does turn out to be impossible. How about a flexible fluorescent tube that can be inserted in the appropriate orifice? |
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"How about a flexible fluorescent tube
that can be inserted in the appropriate
orifice?" |
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basepair, you aren't secretly Leonard of Quirm are you? |
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Uhhhhgggg. Swallowing the equivelent of a magnesium flare. Do you like yours well done to crispy? |
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OK, so you might end up roasted inside, but at least you wouldn't get cancer. |
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"basepair, you aren't secretly Leonard of
Quirm are you". Well, I am indeed of
indeterminate age, but my parents
always told me I was from Redhill rather
than Quirm. I will look into this
further.... |
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Luminosity... you got some spleenin to do. |
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[nineteenthly] I've bunned you for the detailed and calm rebuttal in your anno above. |
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As Australia's own synchrotron nears completion, I've been trying to think of possible commercial uses in addition to the current well known ones. Your idea has led me to establish "Consul's Beam Lime Bum Illumination Inc". Remove your clothes, bend over and back up to that visible high intensity photon beam - you'll light up from inside like a lava lamp! (if it gets too hot, open your mouth and let some pass right through!) Dr Consul should be able to diagnose swollen prostates without all that messy digital probing.... |
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Why, Mr UptheBumma! I'd recognise that face anywhere! Those cheeks! That lovely smile! That fuzzy beard! |
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I've had to drink Barium before, it was nasty, even thought they put chocolate flavoring in it. And you have to consume soo much of the stuff... |
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So people can see your arse in the dark!? I believe that evolution would weed that genetic modification out in no time... or not. Hmmm, bioluminescent belly chicks would be so hot! |
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I had a barium enema once, and i was mainly distressed by the dosage of X-rays necessary to get through the pelvis and image the colon. It's ridiculously large. Now, if there was some kind of highly luminous fluid which could be used instead, the colon could be imaged directly through the abdomen. In fact, a sufficiently sensitive photon detector could use something weaker. |
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Sure beats a Barry M enema, though. High levels of aural toxicity, and you shit base and mascara for weeks. |
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I've got it. You insert a flaccid sausage-shaped balloon, then fill it with glowstick stuff. How would you make it flash? |
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//How would you make it flash?// |
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You'd have to be a flasher. |
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Right, I hereby suggest that my neon balloon thought (I
hesitate to dignify it by calling it an idea) could be added to
this idea with one of those balloon animal things to enable
this to happen. Also, you could fart neon. |
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