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A motorized rotating drum, surfaced in "chalk board" material, on which those with long fingernails can blunt their talons while annoying those around them.
A typical model could consist of a horizontal rotating drum, mounted on a pedestal at armrest height. One could then sit in her armchair,
raise her feet up, play some Bach through headphones, and relax as she gives herself a manicure that sets all around her on edge. As a bonus, the other hand is left free to hold a cup of tea, or a gun with which to defend herself from enraged neighbors.
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Just thinking about this makes my teeth hurt. |
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Is there a china plate version for fork prongs that are too long? |
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"Ve haff vays to make you talk..." |
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To comply with HalfBakery engineering principles, the rotating drum should be clockwork-powered. |
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{{{{{{shudder runs down spine}}}}}} |
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This is just cruel, Guncrazy. Cruel. |
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I have a feeling this wouldn't be as annoying as the real thing - something about the complex control required to just barely overcome friction - but I've no intention of testing the hypothesis. |
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I believe the noise is made by principles similar to a violin bow, where the sliding thing catches and releases hundreds of times a second. |
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