Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Laptop roof tiles

  (+13)(+13)
(+13)
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Phenomenal numbers of laptops are scrapped each year, and their innards are harvested for precious metals. Their plastic cases can be recycled, but this is inefficient and wasteful.

MaxCo. therefore proposes to set up a laptop recycling facility, in which the lids and bases will be sorted by model and colour. Once a suitably large number of one model has been accumulated, they will be sold (bases and lids separately) for use as an environmentally-friendly durable alternative to roofing slates.

That's all I've got.

MaxwellBuchanan, Nov 14 2018

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       I could go into all the reasons why this wouldn't work, but for some reason I really like this idea... [+]
scad mientist, Nov 14 2018
  

       Oh, go on, do. As long as the only holes are around the edges, it should work just fine.
MaxwellBuchanan, Nov 15 2018
  

       If the displays are left in-situ in the lids, they could be used to illuminate the interior roof space. However, a fixing method other than traditional galvanized nails would be required.   

       At last, an actual beneficial use for apple equipment, other than compensating for table leg length when placed on uneven floors.
8th of 7, Nov 15 2018
  

       Ah yes, the Borg, still running on Windows. Do you want to hegemonize? Press ENTER for no, or ESC to cancel.
MaxwellBuchanan, Nov 15 2018
  

       Ah yes, windoze ... a single-user 1980's video game with delusions of adequacy, targeted for (of all things) the wretchedly inadequate x86 processor family (which has several unacknowledged and unpleasant relatives locked in various cellars and attics).   

       Apple did at least use the 68xxx, but then coated it with a thick, glutinous and opaque OS which works about as well as pouring treacle into a mechanical chronometer.   

       If the good is the enemy of the excellent, then the woefully inadequate is clearly the psychopathic murderer of everything better.
8th of 7, Nov 15 2018
  

       I think their shallow spaces may have to be filled with concrete to provide the necessary weight, but other than that, you can get started on my roof at any time. While the scaffolding is in place, we can shove the Borg down the chimney on the end of a shaft to give it a good cleaning. A nice blazing fire will burn him out once the work is completed, so that he doesn't start roosting in there. It's a winner for everyone! [+]
xenzag, Nov 15 2018
  

       I learnt PROLOG at university so, for me, it's logical to build a house starting with the roof and working down.
hippo, Nov 15 2018
  

       // shove the Borg down the chimney //   

       Awww, [xen], are you feeling stressed again ? Are the delusions coming back ? Just sit down in this comfy chair, and have a nice cup of this soothing Monsanto Glow-In-The-Dark herbal Triffid tea, and you'll feel different in no time at all.   

       Maybe not better, but definitely different.
8th of 7, Nov 15 2018
  

       For "Tiny Houses" you could recycle CDs for tiles since they are doing little but taking up space for most people.
blissmiss, Nov 15 2018
  

       They can make a cheap and effective substitute for clay pigeons.   

       Sadly, they don't make an effective substitute for real pigeons, as they just melt when they're put in the oven to roast.
8th of 7, Nov 15 2018
  

       No they don't. Clay pigeons are (a) designed to shatter when hit and (b) break down, gradually, when left lying around.
MaxwellBuchanan, Nov 15 2018
  

       // shatter when hit //   

       Sounds like you're using the wrong weapon and/or ammunition. The ones we hit disintegrate in a spectacular and most satisfactory way.   

       // break down, gradually, when left lying around. //   

       For a given value of "gradually". Come back in a couple of million of your Earth years and all the plastic shrapnel will be long gone.
8th of 7, Nov 15 2018
  

       1) I'd advertise a solar panel (for a modest fee) per case.   

       2) The cases would still have all the gubbins in it, and a sneaky way to leech half the solar panel output.   

       Ate voylar, your own roof-mounted bitcoin factory, with the punter unwittingly paying for it...(sound of evil laughter)
not_morrison_rm, Nov 15 2018
  

       Painted green, you could also get a grant from the UN while it's still funded.
pashute, Nov 19 2018
  

       8th, that's not a bad idea. Ship humanity off the planet in a cryochamber for a million years or so, and then land them back on earth again.
RayfordSteele, Nov 19 2018
  

       + somewhat brilliant
xandram, Nov 20 2018
  

       We'd just go with "Ship humanity off the planet" and leave it at that. The next bit sounds complicated and expensive.
8th of 7, Nov 20 2018
  

       Have we finally run out of AOL free trial CDs?
Cuit_au_Four, Nov 21 2018
  
      
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