h a l f b a k e r yNaturally, seismology provides the answer.
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High heels are de rigueur for many women regardless of
circumstances, but are totally unsuitable feetware when the flood
waters rise. Instead, what is needed for these occasions are a pair
of
L'eauboutins (Milania take note)
L'eauboutins (aka Flood Heels) are simply a pair of shoes with
really,
really tall
stiletto
heels. The front part of the shoes are not so tall, as they function
as
flotation tanks.
Walking in L'eauboutins requires a lot of practice, but as extreme
weather is set to be the norm for many places, there will be
plenty
of opportunity for the fashion conscientious flood survivor learn
how
to strut around elegantly, well clear of the murky waters.
note - updated name courtesy of Christian Louboutin
Galoshes for heels
http://www.pysis.com/ [theircompetitor, Aug 30 2017]
High-heeled flippers
http://dailynewsdig...rs-high-tide-heels/ If things get too deep, try these on for size. [Zeuxis, Aug 31 2017]
http://aands.org/ra...ictorial/extant.php
When waters were high in Venice..... [xenzag, Sep 01 2017]
[link]
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// High heels are de rigueur for many women regardless of
circumstances, but are totally unsuitable feetware when the flood
waters rise // |
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You say that like it's in some way a bad thing ... let 'em drown.
Darwin Footwear, instant karma for those stupid enough to prize
appearance over functionality. |
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Presumably wearing an impractical ,flimsy pocket-free garment
costing more than a major power tool, they'll be dragged smartly
beneath the surface by their huge, overloaded handbags. And good
riddance to them. |
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[-] for promoting the survival of the vain, shallow and terminally
stupid. |
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I guess I better delete it then if you hate women in high
heels so much. Many of my female friends adore their heels
and they certainly interest me greatly. As for them being
vain, shallow and terminally stupid..... I prefer all of that
to the sensible opposites to which you clearly align
yourself. |
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Take no notice, [xen], and wear your high heels with pride. |
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How did you and 8th of 7 pry each other apart? That coal
bag was very secure. |
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Used the carborundum soap to put an edge on the spatula ... cut
our way out. Had to, things got a bit desperate after the marmite
ran out ... |
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// if you hate women in high heels // |
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We consider high heels foolish for anyone, male or female,
unless intended for comic effect.
Women wear skirts; men wear kilts. Comfortable and practical,
why not ? Everyone should be entitled to dress how they please -
no problem. Just apply a little bit of common sense. |
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// Many of my female friends // |
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Is one of them your mother ? |
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// adore their heels and they certainly interest me greatly. // |
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Can't walk far ... can't walk at all on soft surfaces..can't run, can't
drive, hurt the feet & ankles,notorious for causing sprains...great
idea. |
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// As for them being vain, shallow and terminally stupid..... I
prefer all of that to the sensible opposites to which you clearly
align yourself. // |
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And with that self-incriminating admission, the case for the
prosecution rests. |
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Hair, makeup, jewellery, fashion, nails, shoes - they're all a form
of sexual display - TO OTHER WOMEN. Not to men. Men hardly
register any such details, it's all about "I am a better/higher
ranking /more attractive female than you". Fine for the occasional
night out, but when it spills over into the real world it's
potentially dangerous. |
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How could bear to be apart from your beloved? Max has
started drinking his stash of Agent Orange again. It's not
good. I feel it's my duty to restore your romance. I have
another coal bag ready, and this time there are blond wigs
to wear, styled just the way you like them, pre soaked in
sherbet. This time you must bring your own marmite. I
can't be expected to do everything for you two. |
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My mother-in-law stress-fractured her foot by wearing
heels. So I'm forever grateful for that. |
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[xen], I've still got a little Agent Orange left, if you want to address your armpit hair problem. |
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Once Mrs Max finds out about you and 8th of 7, you'll be
needing every drop of that Monsanto juice yourself. I have
my beautiful fashion students to groom my armpits. |
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[8th] is like a brother to me, though I haven't yet tried to have him committed, shot or deported as many times. |
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Incest! Very brave to confess to that. Are the children all
floating around in jars of oily liquid with heavy rubber
stoppers to keep them from getting out and causing havoc? |
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The tops are wired down, like champagne corks. |
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Opening one would certainly make any event memorable ... think
Chestburster" ... |
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// I haven't yet tried to have him committed, shot or deported as
many times. // |
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While that is admittedly corrrect, it is - as usual - a classic
example of [MB] being economical with the facts. |
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Committal requires the signatures of two practicing physicians. It
does not happen if one "doctor "is not a physician but a D.D.,and
has left the credit card charge slip for $103.45 ($79.99 plus sales
tax and shipping) stapled to the Diploma, and the other "doctor
" has a half-size stethoscope in blue and white plastic round his
neck, a jam thermometer in the breast pocket of his white-ish
coat, and a folded sheet of brightly-printed card reading "JUNIOR
DOCTOR PLAY-SET, AGES 5 TO 10 YEARS" in his hand.
The fact that his ID badge clearly had the words "Library Card"
scribbled out and "DOTCOR" written in with a black felt tip didn't
help. |
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The fact that we have avoided being shot thus far is more a
function of fast reflexes and continuing good luck than anything
else, although we do accept that the vast majority of projectiles
are not actually aimed at us. |
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Standing at the open front door in your bedroom slippers and
wee-willie-winkie nightcap, pointing out into the rain-lashed
howling darkness and shouting "GET OUT, AND DON'T COME
BACK !!" is no way to treat a guest, simply because they have
committed a very minor social faux-pas; and it doesn't count as
deportation. |
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Who's eyes do they have? Or do they even have eyes?
Perhaps some crude type of tentacle with a knob on the
end that senses light and dark. (I bet they get that from
Max) |
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Part Mugwai, part baby Chinchilla, part Cthulhu ... |
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You've been liberal with your seed. Does Max know about
these other partners? |
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He did the gene-splicing ... |
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He wanted to include some DNA from life-forms originating in
Central Asia, but we said that would be a Steppe too far ... |
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Come on... what you really mean is that he split his jeans. |
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Back in the idea, we've got ... fashion stilts, plus buoyancy aids? |
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I'm not sure whether the wearer is supposed to make like a very
small catamaran, or a very small oil rig. Ooh, wait, I see; it's a kind
of gondolierery, or punting: the tips of the stiletto heels engage
with the drowned ground to provide propulsion. This will require
variable retraction from one pace to the next, which will be almost
impossible, but not quite. Very half-baked! [+] |
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We have made it very clear that our view is definitely not misogynistic on this matter; misanthropic maybe, but misogynistic, no. |
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// My female friends love their high heels. // |
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// They are well used to balancing on vertiginous footware. // |
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// Several work as models // |
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Miss step, twist ankle, fall off catwalk ... health and safety at work, anyone ? |
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// and I see no reason why a bit of flood water should impede their enjoyment of stepping out and about. // |
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Shoes with tall "platform" soles that maintain the ankle joint at a natural, unstressed angle would make sense in such circumstances. |
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Why do you think I meant you? Ha - I accidentally deleted it
anyway. (Meant to edit one word) |
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"Then who the hell else are you talking... you talking to me? Well I'm the only one here." |
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... or I suppose we could think of them as ninja boat shoes with
unusual rudders? |
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"In such a harsh environment the rare, shy 'on-topic anno' barely
survives. Here we can see a nest, but the annotation's chances of
finding a mate in the present climate seem slim."
</attenborough>. |
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What I had said was: that in a sea of negative comments you were one of the very few to have actually understood the true essence of the idea, and not engaged in a misogynistic rant. Many of my female friends, some of whom are models, are well used to strutting on catwalks wearing vertiginous heels. Why should they be denied this experience by a bit of flood water? I know it's a daft idea..... this is why it's here :-) (check last link for historical version) 8th of 7 then took ownership of his remarks, despite not being identified by me. ie I smoked him out - ha |
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Aesthetically, high heels work quite well for females (and those who aspire to be female) within a very limited environmental range. |
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And not at all for males (and those who etc) which aesthete is "large and dangerous" - the increase in "large" is offset by the obvious decrease in "dangerous". |
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