Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Kidapult

Heave ho!
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The kidapult would be mounted at the end of a dock, probably at a summer camp. I envision it as a hybrid catapult/trebuchet device for chucking kids off the dock and way out into the lake. It is a long beam with an off center pivot point, running the length of the dock. On the long end of the arm is a seat where the missile kid waits, facing the lake. There is a pivot point, and under the (very) short end hangs a weight. The weight dangles down thru a hole in the dock. When the weight is dropped, it pulls the short end down fast, levering the long end with the kid up and over.

Missile-wanna-bes slave away at a wheel, hoisting the weight back up out of the lake. When the weight is at its highest, kid missile hits the lever and is flung. The kidapult is devised so the kid flies at a low angle. At the end of the arc, water impact is comparable to a wipeout while waterskiing. The ex-missile swims back and goes to work at the wheel for the next kid.

bungston, Dec 15 2003

The Fatapult http://www.halfbake...idea/The_20Fatapult
benfrost sends obese into the water [FarmerJohn, Oct 05 2004, last modified Oct 17 2004]

Human trap http://www.halfbake...m/idea/Human_20trap
benfrost sends art lovers into the water [FarmerJohn, Oct 05 2004, last modified Oct 17 2004]

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       I like this idea.. Just gotta make sure there is "police tape" around the hole in the deck.. Someone could loose an arm or a leg in that thing.   

       "WARNING: Do not cross. Unless you wanna be the new spokesperson for the war amps" Play safe..
v0rtexx, Dec 15 2003
  

       <Picard> Mr. Warf, let's fire a small child across their bow and show them we really mean business. On my signal...Engage.<p> +
sartep, Dec 15 2003
  

       "Son, did I ever tell you about the camp that I went to when I was a kid? No? Well, instead of teaching us to skip rocks across the lake, they skipped children across the lake! Rough camp son."   

       Pissing my knickers here. [+++++]
Klaatu, Dec 15 2003
  

       For even more fun, mount the kidapult on the edge of a high cliff, with big, pointy rocks at the bottom.   

       Please email design drawings soonest, right now I'm off to order some timber .......
8th of 7, Dec 15 2003
  

       There's more than one way to skin a kid, aye, 7/8?
thumbwax, Dec 15 2003
  

       Perhaps you should change your name to "bung son"
dobtabulous, Dec 15 2003
  

       I fail to see how launching yourself out of a trebuchet could EVER have a positive outcome.
Letsbuildafort, Dec 15 2003
  

       You need some other kids in the water, as targets.
phundug, Dec 15 2003
  

       Put the kids in a large plastic sphere, roughly 1.5x body length and a little flexible. Then they'd skip and roll on contact with the water, and be severely injured a little less.   

       Also, in these balls, they could actually be somewhat safe targets for each other, especially considering how hard it is to aim a trebuchet on a dock.
sophocles, Dec 15 2003
  

       [fort], I guess that depends on what kind of a drain on society you are.
RayfordSteele, Dec 15 2003
  

       I know I'm a good candidate, I just can't see a good outcome ... I mean, C'MON, THEY'RE MIDEVIL SEIGE ENGINES!
Letsbuildafort, Dec 15 2003
  

       [Letsbuildafort], you're right, launching yourself out of a trebuchet rarely has a positive outcome. However, we're talking about launching OTHER people out of a trebuchet. What's the downside?
darksasami, Dec 15 2003
  

       The downside would be cranking the rock up 20 times before it's your turn again.
lintkeeper2, Dec 15 2003
  

       So would be this a covert method to control population growth worldwide?
PauloSargaco, Jan 16 2004
  

       Great idea.Who can say they never met a kid they would fling a long distance given the chance? I know I have.
python, Jan 16 2004
  

       Or you could use a motor, to avoid child labor.
Face, Jan 18 2004
  

       Dear bungston: As your corporate legal council, please find enclosed the following suggested design modifications, along with the preferred medical/dental/death/dismemberment waiver forms to be completed in triplicate by the...   

       Other than that, sign me up for the fling-a-kid project. The farther the better.
Itsmeagain, Jan 18 2004
  

       Perhaps the arm could swing in a horizontal arc, and a little spin could be induced on the child. Then they would probably skip two or three times before sinking.
Jamoni, Mar 26 2004
  

       [itsmeagain], Don't most summer camps make you sign similar waivers anyway? You've got rock-climbing, swimming, white-water canoeing, rope-swinging-into-water, and that's just your conventional summer camps. Space Camp and Aviation Challenge really get down to brass tacks, what with subjecting kids to G forces, putting kids in those spinny astronaut thingies, and various other stuff.
Eugene, Mar 26 2004
  
      
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