Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Inspectya Frost

My car's the star.
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Sometimes I'm in such a hurry to get to work that my heart sinks when I see half an inch of frost on my windscreen.

Ignoring safety advice, I fling a kettle of hot water at it to clear my screen and get out onto the road as quickly as possible.

This morning though, as I saw the first frost of the year, I noticed just how pretty those crystaline forms were. If there was a crack team of cameramen prepared to create a time-lapse film my windscreen overnight, I'd employ them.

Although I'd enjoy watching nature at work, I think I might feel sorry for my car, looking all cold and lonely. I'm feeling weird today.

NB The title works best if you've seen the UK TV detective show, Inspector Frost.

Fishrat, Nov 24 2003

'hoar' at Dictionary.com http://dictionary.r...e.com/search?q=HOAR
for blissmiss. [DrBob, Oct 05 2004, last modified Oct 17 2004]

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       As exciting as watching paint dry or grass grow. Even more problematic would be neighbors home frost movies. I don't think this would be a good idea in less you were high. Then it would gets tons of buns from me.
lizziepunkin, Nov 24 2003
  

       Well, don't forget it's time-lapse [lizzie] so you'd get the whole freaky/beautiful pattern developing in a matter of seconds. I'm inclined to think that many things, including grass growing and especially paint drying, would be great to watch at high speed. On the paint idea, I think dark matt terracotta drying on a very porous plasterboard in a relatively warm room would be the most interesting.
Fishrat, Nov 24 2003
  

       [Rods] - Gimme an idea for Daziel and Pascoe. Then I'll be impressed. OK, the title is a pun, but I really would like to see frost growing on my car windscreen. Do I need to get out more?
Fishrat, Nov 24 2003
  

       Now you're just being silly. Well done.
Fishrat, Nov 24 2003
  

       His sidekick, Pascoe, could bring out a series of innovative recipes for stuffing poultry.
PeterSilly, Nov 24 2003
  

       A camera watches over, while the decomposing body of an old lady-detective develops an outer-crust. Called of course, Agatha crispy.
dobtabulous, Nov 24 2003
  

       Photographs of the beautiful patterns of hoar frost in windows have been around since the dawn of photography, and I've seen time lapse movies too.   

       I would suggest moving this to the screen-saver section, with fractal modelling of frost on the computer screen. That, I think, would go down very well.
DrCurry, Nov 24 2003
  

       I would rather somebody film the formation of fog on the inside of my windscreen after I've scraped all the bastard ice off the outside and am already on my way to work but the blowers aren't up to speed/warmth yet.   

       They could study the film closely, get a government grant to research the whys and wherefores and then tell me HOW exactly, the fog knows which bits I want to look through and then manages to form precisley at that spot but leaves the passenger side crystal clear.
squeak, Nov 24 2003
  

       Whatever a hoar is, [bliss], I'm sure you're not one. [Dr.C], I'll take your advice on that and post it in a few days. Thanks.
Fishrat, Nov 25 2003
  

       Not intended as a pun, but Will Phillip Glass do the score?
wombat, Nov 25 2003
  

       FR: there ya go - 17 croissants so far - do I not call them right?
DrCurry, Nov 28 2003
  

       I owe you one, [DrC]. I owe you seventeen, actually.
Fishrat, Dec 05 2003
  

       You'd get more croissants though, Fishrat, if you just had a team of crack cameramen coming round in the morning and scraping the ice off of everyone's windscreen for them and don't worry about the film, we'll do it some other day when we're in less of a rush to get going.
DrBob, Dec 05 2003
  


 

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