h a l f b a k e r yExpensive, difficult, slightly dangerous, not particularly effective... I'm on a roll.
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A flotation aid which, when activated, inflates into a life-size (or slightly larger) figure of Jesus.
Outspread arms (with hidden submerged "floats" at the hands and ankles) provide stability, so that the user can actually lie on top of the figure, clear of the water, like an airbed.
The "robe"
is a thin, flexible opaque waterproof spraydeck to keep spray, excessive sunshine etc. off the user.
Crown of thorns and stigmata are only painted on to avoid compromising the pressure integrity of the device.
Versions to offend adherents of other religions are under development.
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Annotation:
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That could be done with a conventional multi-occupant life raft with Jesus in the centre. |
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He would be a good thing for searchers to look out for; a pose like Rio's "Christ the Redeemer" would suit. |
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When you throw it in does it convert all the water
to wine? [+] Finger hovers over awarding a second
croissant. (I'm the only person on the hb who can
do this by the way) |
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//I'm the only person on the hb who can do this by
the way// - two accounts? |
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The second question is this: Is there a "Hitler
version" that instead of floating around, grips the
person with locked arms, then takes them to the
bottom as it rapidly sinks? |
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//two accounts// ha - no. I’m just special. |
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Would it come with biscuits and wine so people could enjoy
"the body and the blood" before sharks appear and start
enjoying their own version? |
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That's an extra cost option at ordering time. |
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but... all the air would just leak out of his hands |
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// Crown of thorns and stigmata are only painted on to avoid compromising the pressure integrity of the device. // |
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You weren't paying attention, were you ? Were you ? Eh ? |
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Yes, but look on the bright side ... |
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Huh. Makes sense.
Colour me stigmatized. |
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// Can we get a "Brian Saves" life raft? // |
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//Can we get a "Brian Saves" life raft?//
As long as it whistles the tune as you deflate it... |
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Can we do one of Mohammed that has the inflator in
a strategic location? |
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Why not slightly bigger? for the capacity to stand on the Redeemer and plead the why the forsaken action, to the all. |
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It's about a personalized experience of redemption... |
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// has the inflator in a strategic location? // |
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What, like the Fulda Gap, or the Khyber Pass or somewhere like that... ? |
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No, more like the inflatable Autopilot on 'Airplane.' |
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"Not my first time" life preserver. |
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