h a l f b a k e r yIt's as much a hovercraft as a pancake is a waffle.
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So the shower in my dorm is used by 4 guys, but it only has 1 shelf for soap. If more than one person uses bar soap, this is a problem.
You can stick a shelf in there with suction cups, but I've no idea whether the walls are the right surface for them to stick well.
So seal some foam (or something
similarly light and shock-absorbent?) inside the shelf thing. Then if it should happen to fall off, even if you're not in the shower your soap won't break on the floor.
I'd put some kind of simple hinge lid on it, too, so the soap can't fall out.
[link]
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Body wash seems to run out fast. There's already like six bottles in my shower. I have tons of bar soap due to some intruiging shenanigans. |
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There's nowhere to hang a soap-on-a-rope (do they still make those?) because the showerhead is curved down and the dial is enormous. |
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..If you know what I mean. |
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Maybe what you actually need is a bar of soap shaped like a vagina. Maybe a hollow solid that exudes body wash strategically. |
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pretty sure genitalia-shaped soap + a shared shower won't end well. |
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I think he has already implied that there is significant wanking. |
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Heaven forfend that it should be insignificant ... |
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Some sort of waterproof soap carrier is clearly required; the sort that makes it impossible to "drop the soap" ... |
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[rcarty]: The brand of choice for refills would be called "Soap for pussies." It would also smell like flowers and butterflies. |
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Don't ask me what butterflies smell like. I don't have any idea, nor do I particularly want to. |
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They probably smell like they taste; bitter and dendelion-y. |
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// They probably smell like they taste // |
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"What does Swan taste like ?" |
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Any amount is a significant -- you know what, no, let's abandon this line of conversation please. |
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I've got nowhere to put my soap! Surely this isn't a confined issue? I'd imagine it exists at the very least for lots of college students with shared showers. I also know people who have way too many soaps and things in their showers; this would give them more space and protect their enormous soap investments. Because what's more tragic than a broken bar of soap? |
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A moment of silence for all the bar soaps that have been taken from this world before their time. |
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Could this problem not be addressed by the
purchase of (1) a soap rack (2) an electric drill (3) a
tile bit and (4) a screwdriver? |
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He said it was a dorm. Prolly not even allowed to
put thumbtacks in the walls. |
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Ah. In that case, the underlying problem is one of
subhuman obedience. |
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When I lived in a dorm, many centuries ago, we all had
little
plastic caddies for our soap and sundries that we carried
to and from the shower. Not only did it prevent the
nonondrum posed here, but it also kept people from
messing with your stuff in the name of pranking, as, if
memory serves, college-age male humans are sometimes
wont to do. The school I went to didn't provide these
shower caddies gratis, but it did tell new students where
to buy
them (the Student Union, of course). Mine had a
rubberized non-slip hook that suspended it from the
showerhead and it sported a lovely Black Bear motif. |
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And you didn't drill holes in the tiles because of
subhuman obedence, or was it some other reason? |
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The pranks I conducted were a little bit more, um,
elaborate. |
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The reason, then was a fine regard* in deciding
when,
and when not, to antagonize The Man. Not at all the
same thing as subhuman obedience. |
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*You can't have a fine disregard without a fine
regard. Otherwise, you're not inventing rugby,
you're just spoiling the game. |
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When I was in college, I didn't drill through the tiles to install a new soap rack because drilling through tile is frigging hard work. |
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Shower caddy and a dollop of hot melt glue to keep it from sliding off of the pipe. Problem solved. |
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$0.50 cent soap dish with a lid at the dollar store and a plastic baggie to carry it with you in your bathroom kit. |
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How about you drill into the tie and support the soap dish with screws (and expansion anchors) |
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or just get one of those hanging baskets that hang from the shower head. That's what I did. |
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Share the soap. All 4 use the same bar. It is soap! No-one gets cooties from soap. It kills germs. If you are skeptical about the body hairs your roommates leave on it, pull them off. |
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The other option would be a box on the floor. Keep your soap in there. When you take a shower get it out and use it. But you know those guys too cheap to buy their own soap will just use yours anyway, even with the huge number of body hairs you left on it. So just be full of love for your fellow man. You share the same air too. |
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Speaking practically (which pains me) there are tiered metal shower shelves. You can wedge a dowel of wood in the shelf thing and hang the shelves from that. |
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All are pretty good suggestions, I concede. |
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But I'm afraid they're not contrived enough. I need my fix to be completely tailored to one specific and not entirely important purpose, to the extent that using it for anything else would be dangerous to your health. It needs to be so well thought-out AFTER the initial "Is there an easier way to do this?" phase that there's no turning back, no acknowledging the idiocy. |
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I'm thinking I'll put a set of propellors on it so it can fly itself out of the shower while I'm drying off. It can charge its battery with the water current. |
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not one vote - must be a guy thing. |
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Maybe a row of spindles at waist level? You could impale the soap after you are done. |
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//Maybe what you actually need is a bar of soap shaped like a vagina//
No, shaped like a penis, each bar being a replica (scale or otherwise) of the washer's wab. This way: easy to carry (you know how to hold one); not likely to be stolen; will line up nicely on the sinktop - indeed, you could reach blindly through the showercurtain to grab your soapcock, identifying your own through tactile familiarity. |
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The alternative is to manufacture and use a soap/adhesive combination, to allow each bar (phallic or otherwise) to the showerwalls, you can clean yourself as normal and then step into your post-shower solvent bath to rinse off the soap. |
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/a soap/adhesive combination/ |
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Yes, yes; just so. I cannot fathom how the world has gotten along without such a hybrid product for so long. Once devised there will really be no need for anything else. |
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Alternatively, have the walls of your showercubicle soap-plated, allowing you to simply rub yourself against them to further your ablute. |
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Soap in the shape of a butt plug... |
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1. No one else would use it
2. You'd never lose it |
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I forsee a market opportunity at Penn State. |
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For [calum]'s idea, there would need to be an
associated service for a sculptor to come round and
carve a model of your phallus from soap for you
("Ooh sir, I think I'll need an extra large bar of soap
for this one"). |
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