I Know What You Ate Last Night

I Know What You Ate Last Night is Apple’s new diagnostic app which enables your iPhone to tell exactly what you ate recently.
Here’s how it works:
After installing the app, you must follow this process.
1 Do not eat or drink anything for at least 12 hours.
2 Select “Calibrate Mode” and hold your phone against your stomach for a minute so that it learns the normal background sound of your digestion when it’s at complete rest.
3 Activate “Identify Mode” and eat something like a digestive biscuit with a cup of coffee.
4 Hold the phone against your stomach again so that the app can listen to the sound and compare it with the complex waveforms of food being digested already stored on its massive database. I Know What You Ate Last Night will identify your food as Coffee and Biscuits.

Over time as its database grows, I Know What You Ate Last Night will be able to identify more and more detail, eventually reporting back the exact nature of the food and drink consumed ie in this case that would be Robert’s Coffee and McVitie’s Hobnob biscuits.

Diagnosis of a meal will be able to confirm the authenticity of all the ingredients, wine vintage etc, simply by analysing the sounds of them being digested. For example Guinness will be distinguished from Beamish, and the best cheese and onion crips as Tayto (from N.Ireland of course)