h a l f b a k e r yA dish best served not.
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High-rising seat
Small cars will soon be able respond to the challenge of tall cars | |
Truck-sized rvs and off-roaders are said to be popular because on crowded highways their drivers like the highs they get out of being higher up in the world than drivers of low-down cars.
This is well-known to be the cause of "rise rage" - very low gestures being made out of the windows of the overlooked
vehicles, directed at the higher-up drivers.
So for all vertically challenged small cars and drivers, I propose my HighRiser car seat. When threatened by a taller car than yours, at the touch of a button, your seat rises smoothly, together with its extended controls.
Having eye-balled the offending tank-driver, and made appropriate gestures, you can either drive on in the high position or descend. The HighRiser will come in two versions. The one for sliding-roof cars will cost less than the one for one-piece roofs.
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Lazy tongs or concertina or other tongue in cheek solutions aside, traffic authorities in many countries are reporting more deaths occurring inside these beasts than in ordinary cars. |
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They flip and roll all too easily and their upper structure collapses under the weight of the lower structure. Half-baked ideas are need for reducing this death-rate. |
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Mention a sick joke, did everyone see the picture of the Concorde with Wilderness AT tires? "Officials have now determined the origin of the American-made part pointed to as a cause of the Concorde crash."
What if the pickup truck bed (you didn't know that SUV were really pickup trucks?) was stored over the passenger compartment instead of below the passengers' feet? If the bed was up, as would be likely in the event of an SUV being loaded up and top heavy with people, and the vehicle would roll over it would land on a flat metal skid that would slide the SUV to a stop like a toboggan. |
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Isn't that called a "[mini]van"? I don't think they cost $10K more, either... |
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Cornerposts (those metal or fiberglas extensions of the body that hold up the roof and box the glass) are not designed to support the weight of the car, and that is what makes rollovers so lethal. Shatter the glass and you've even less crush resistance to count on. Since the view is really sucky from up in an SUV anyway, just remake the headrest into a grip-like a set of tongs. When the car's tilt switch gets activated, the head-tongs push the passengers out of the car through their seats! |
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How about having the head tongs pop their heads like a zit when they try to drive their Sport Futility Vehicle while talking on the phone? |
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How about rigging gas pumps to froth up the petrol with more air in relation to the height off of the ground the gas fill spout is? That would artificially tax high vehicles, tax artificially high vehicles, tax high vehicles artificially? King of the Hill, beaming with pride: "My Juggernaut is twenty five hands off the ground and she drinks fifty-five gallons at a fillup!" |
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