h a l f b a k e r yNormal isn't your first language, is it?
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Just like regular skydiving, except instead of using a
parachute to slow your descent, you jump out with a tank of
helium that is connected to a bunch of giant deflated
balloons. By opening the valve and inflating the balloons, you
can gradually slow your descent, eventually coming to a
complete
stop mid-air, and even ascending should you so
desire. Just keep an eye on your helium level to make sure
you have enough to do a controlled landing.
Falling With Helium
http://what-if.xkcd.com/62/
[ytk, Sep 10 2013]
[link]
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Balloons with any decent lift are very thin and should
be inflated in nearly still air. I doubt you will find
such conditions during even the gentlest decent. (-) |
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However if for some reason you decided to use a more robust material, just bear in mind that you're going to get a little over a kg of lift for every cubic metre. |
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Perhaps one could use the same type of balloon used for
hot air ballooning, except made out of mylar in order to
trap helium. Inflate it using air, which would slow your
descent somewhat, then add helium to force the air out
and create buoyancy. It might require a lot of helium, but
nobody said defying death was cheap. |
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I suppose at that point, instead of using helium you could
heat the air inside the balloon using a backpack mounted
furnace, but that sounds a bit risky. |
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//instead of using helium you could heat the air inside the balloon using a backpack mounted furnace, but that sounds a bit risky// |
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Or the ultimate flaming sendoff for deceased aerialists. |
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The hybrid is a very strong envelope that expands
into a parachute when inflated. |
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...or a bungee cord to something in low Earth orbit. |
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Anything in low Earth orbit is going to be moving at quite a clip relative to the ground. I doubt you'd want to be dragged through the atmosphere that quickly. |
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So, attach your bungee cord to something in geostationary orbit instead. A kind of personal space elevator. |
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Dangerous, wildly impractical and something I
wouldn't want to miss on tv or as a viral video. |
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I have this nasty feeling it might be practicable, one very long skinny balloon, deployed empty and it just trails above the diver like a drogue, as the gas gets released it just thickens it out, so no mega-instant stresses involved. |
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And upon landing the skydiver (if, by some quirk of fate, they are still alive at this point) can either inhale some of the helium for a squeaky voice, or tie it into a huge balloon dog to amuse passers by while waiting for the recovery vehicle. |
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Expect to see this kind of skydiving/street theatre in Covent Garden soon, next to the jacked potato trailer and the Tube museum. |
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//the jacked potato trailer // ? |
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//the jacked potato trailer // |
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Well, it's shocking to me to see how few motorists these days know how to change a potato. That's why there's a trailer, for professional assistance. |
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According to today's what-if.xkcd.com (link), this is
apparently doable! Who's crazy now? |
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