h a l f b a k e r yA few slices short of a loaf.
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Alcohol, in small doses, produces mild euphoric effects; but in larger doses produces symptoms of depression. Excessive consumption can be a contributory cause of depressive illness.
To counteract this, small amounts of mild anti-depressant medications i.e. extract of St. John's wort, or a low dose
of an SSRI, could be blended with a Pilsner-style lager during manufacture. The dose would not necessarily be enough for full clinical effectiveness, but would be sufficient to counteract the negative effects of the alcohol on the consumer.
[LATER] Of course, some people go for a drink when they're miserable or depressed about something and the more they drink, the worse things look. Everyone has come across maudlin drunks from time to time. Happy Pils ensures that they actually feel better and more optimistic as a result of a drink or two.
The objective would be to ensure that the drinker mantains a cheery, positive outlook on life, and thus the product would be retailed under the brand name "Happy Pils".
PIL's Happy?
http://www.allmusic...M&sql=Ajbkpu3u5anxk
[mrthingy, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 05 2004]
[link]
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"For great mental health, follow the Bear" - Hoffmeister ad from the early 1980's |
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Fat n' Happy would be a Stout, wouldn't it? |
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Djinn and tonic. Ok, so a djinn is an evil genie, but the Wishmaster is a djinn and he always seems pretty happy. |
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"Tell them there is somebody new in town, and he feeds on wishesssss..." |
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I've never quite understood the appeal of continuing to drink after the mild euphoria is achieved. To me, people who clamor about "let's go out and get smashed" have always seemed a bit stupid. I'm not saying they actually are stupid; it's so common that I realize the problem must be in my understanding. |
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<looks hopefully at top of page awaiting deluge of croissants> |
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Sorry 8th, no croissant. I'm all for fighting depression by looking for the cause. Here, it's clearly drinking too much! Anti-depressants are not natural. Good pun though. |
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All right, we admit it. We thought up the pun first and then wrote the idea around it. |
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You forgot to say "My name's 8th, and I..." first. Facing up to the fact that you have a problem is half of the battle. |
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Sadly, it's not us that has the problem. We consume a lot of alcohol, but strangely it does not seem to impair our friendly, sunny, outgoing disposition. However, close observation of individuals with marital problems has partially inspired this idea. |
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Your denial has clearly caused you to mis-interpret the annotation. I meant a problem with pun-related ideas. I know how addictive they can be. |
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//Anti-depressants are not natural.//
I think you'll find that St John's Wort is natural, what with it being a plant and all. |
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We're not in denial, [sild]. We didn't misintepret your annotation at all. We don't write many pun-related ideas; well, not many. Just the odd one or two, now and again. Hardly ever, really. And we've got it under control, we can stop any time we want to. It's not a problem. Really, it isn't. Just shut up about it, OK ? Leave us alone .... |
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[angel] - sorry, I meant that I think it's unnatural to require them. |
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Gar bless ya, Eiff *hic*. (falls off barstool into a pile of smiles) |
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<looks at top of page, notes only 2 croissants as yet, sighs deeply, reaches for another case of Happy Pils> |
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Pluterday has discovered that she can drink a bottle or even more of her favorite Merlot, and not experience any of the negative effects of alcohol. The trick is to dose heavily with fatty acids just before happy hour. Six grams or so of flax seed oil, a couple of grams of fish oil, toss in a little E, and that should do it. And another few grams afterwards, for good measure won’t hurt.
[8th] Here's a croissant to cheer you up. |
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Careful, or you'll get the standard stop-annotating-your-own-idea-to-keep-it-at-the-top-of-the-page admonishing..er..admonishment..er..oh, who cares (*hic*). Have a crashonn, me old mate. |
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Donn youtellush not to .... to .... <hic> annota... annot... anntonate.... annerrrrrr.... add to our brulliant.... <hic>..... idea youlittlebarsteward...... come on then if you think you're hard enough, come on then, we'll kick your head in, have a go, come on........ errrrr...... we don't feel well...... we ....errruuugh |
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//dose heavily with fatty acids just before happy hour // |
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Fatty acids ? Mmmmmm, fish and chips, mmmmmm.... |
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[blissmiss] That would be true for mineral oil. |
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Bottle of Merlot, some E and a few grams! You're going to wind up in the hospital at this rate, [pluterday]. |
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<furiously pressing call button for nurse to reconnect laptop> |
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(...never can remember that nurse's name, oh yes! Miss... blissmiss...blackfoot indian, I think...) |
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'Fraid it won't work as described. SSRIs take weeks to become effective, and St. John's Wort has been clinically proven not to work at all. |
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Wellbutrin Ale. Mmmmmmmm. Drink regularly for at least a month. |
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But seriously, I would imagine that this would curtail the desire to consume alcohol excessively, so (+) for that, but it sounds like you’re mixing depressants and anti-depressants. I don’t know the outcome of that combo. |
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Wellbutrin + alcohol = seizures. That could be kinda fun at parties. |
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My experience is that, as with most 'recreational' drugs, the mood that your in after drinking alcohol is very much influenced by the mood that your in before you start taking it. Taking stuff to change your mood is a bit of a no, no in my book. |
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Yup, seizures would definitely curtail the desire. |
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Hmm, we thought it was MAOs and the older tricyclics that had negative indications with alcohol. We know the SSRIs are slow to act. |
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/St. John's Wort has been clinically proven not to work at all// |
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I heard the other day that placeboes (placebos?) had been proven to have a beneficial effect. Kind of kah-nackers most medical trials if it's true. |
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//I heard the other day that placeboes (placebos?) had been proven to have a beneficial effect.// |
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My doctor started me on placebos for a nervous condition. They worked really well at first. But after my second refill, I found that I was taking two a day to get the same effect. Then it was four. I was getting all jittery too, so I went to the pharmacist. Turns out that they had accidentally filled my prescription with sugar pills! But he was nice. He gave me free refills to make up for it. I really like those placebos. The pink ones. Be sure to ask your doctor for the pink ones... |
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I find the sustained release placebos much better than the ordinary ones. |
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Oh, I can’t take those. They just pop right through me! <pluterday suddenly frowns and shifts uncomfortably, begins stabbing button for the nurse, shouting -- blissmiss! another mootóópis problem!> |
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We tried the fast-acting ones, and the generic ones, but they didn't seem as good as the prescription stuff. Then we went to a private doctor and he prescribed regular injections rather than the pills. It costs a little more but we believe it's doing us good. |
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The more expensive ones are better! Leans towards [8th]. I have this Blackfoot nurse, shhh, she might be listening, who told me about this old Indian cure...whispers...but then I said to her, saa, I could never do THAT <voice rises as pluterday looks significantly at the nurse> because I’m a lady! Nitsikohkia'pssi! |
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// The more expensive ones are better! // |
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Hmm, we've heard that too. We think we read it in a magazine in the doctor's waiting room. We spend a lot of time in waiting rooms. We guess the injections are OK but we've been worried for a while about possible adverse reactions, so we searched on the web and found a load of really worrying stuff .... we asked our doctor, and he sent us to a specialist who prescribed us some different placebos to prevent us getting side effects from the injections. So we're happy now, except we keep getting these neck pains and headaches because we worry to much and we spent too much time sitting in uncomfortable chairs in doctor's waiting rooms. |
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<Puts hand conspiratorially on 8th’s knee.> You know what? Take flax seed oil. Lots and lots! Gets you one of these comfy hospital beds. And a pretty Indian nurse <looking kindly towards bliss> even if possibly psychotic. |
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We don't like those hospital beds much. The straps chafe our wrists. |
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Oh, top linking mrthingy! |
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Have you ever seen a person consume alcohol on top of their daily antidepressant dose? They seem to get 'happy' really quickly, and generally take a sharp downward turn after a few drinks. I can't say I'd condone this. |
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// I can't say I'd condone this.// |
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Why, do you have a speech impediment, have you been drinking, or is it a phobic thing ? |
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We can say "We'd condone this." fairly easily. Perhaps there's a self help group you can join. |
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This idea doesn't make much sense. Anti-depressents and alcohol are contra-indicated, i.e. they don't mix well, since alcohol stops the antidepressants working. |
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I agree with the person that said you should look for treating the cause of depression, and not just try to mask it.... |
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What if the cause of your depression is not enough alcohol? |
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The reverse tends to be true I'm afraid [egbert], that's why alcohol is classified as a depressant - in sufficient regular doses it will induce depression. Nice plan [8th], shame it won't work :-) |
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