Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
h a l f b a k e r y
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Halfbakery Kindergarten

 Kindergarten with Halfbakery regulars as teachers
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Bring your kids to this exciting place with non-stop surprises all the time. It is impossible to describe this place more accurately I am afraid. Anything can happen there.

It should be a movie also. A plotless movie, no Harry Potter.

—rrr, Jul 19 2004

inspiration for this idea http://www.halfbake...20Bedtime_20Stories
Wagster's comment about the Lego forklift truck with laser defenses [rrr, Oct 04 2004]

More procrastination http://www.halfbake...nights_20Are_20Bold
Still haven't tried the 'Overtly scientific bedtime stories' because it was easier to read "Karl and the Goose Pokers" [wagster, Nov 14 2004]

[link]






       (looks around) This isn't kindergarten?
—Worldgineer, Jul 19 2004
   

       No naps. Never any naps.
—bungston, Jul 19 2004
   

       I thought this would be where you learn how to search the 'bakery, use Google, grammar and spelling, netiquette, proper 'bakery form, etcetera.   

       No naps ? I wanna go home nowwwww !
—normzone, Jul 19 2004
   

       You can eat everything in the room because it's all made of custard.
—phundug, Jul 19 2004
   

       //I thought this would be where you learn how to search the 'bakery, use Google, grammer and spelling, netiquette, proper 'bakery form, etcetera//   

       Do we just change the name then?
—silverstormer, Jul 19 2004
   

       "It was an exciting place, full of surprises. He walked in the door and could hear the sound of the film noir commentary as he stepped into something sticky. Custard. He should have known. Suddenly, out of the dark came a bioluminescent ninja with a Lego katana made entirely of cheese..."
—goff, Jul 20 2004
   

       "Can I make a lego please?" asked one of the younger children innocently.   

       The adults, almost as one, turned on the small child and began shouting.   

       "Read the helpfile!" shouted the one adult   

       "Unoriginal!" Shouted another, "Ha Ha - Lego - Yawn" ,   

       "Troll!",   

       "It's *some* lego for god's sake!" corrected one   

       "WTCTLISTOD" intoned another.   

       An argument began, about whether lego was invented in the US, or the UK, before someone looked out the window and quietly explained that it was, in fact, Denmark - at which point the adults began cracking in-jokes and all agreeing with each other how great they all were and how much better the kindergarten was before all these wretched children turned up...
—zen_tom, Jul 22 2004
   

       This idea is just so wrong. Even if I had kids, I certainly wouldn't trust you dodgy lot with them.
—DrBob, Jul 22 2004
   

       Only if I get to be the kick boxing teacher (and spanish, obviously).
—Pericles, Jul 22 2004
   

       Can [Neitzche] teach sunday school?
—daseva, Jul 22 2004
   

       Do we get to travel to the kindergarten, or do the kids travel around the world to us?   

       As a follow up question, can this kindergarten be located on a tropical beach somewhere, and include an open bar?
—Worldgineer, Jul 22 2004
   

       I'll teach swimming, and maybe help Pericles with the spanish class.
—swimr, Jul 22 2004
   

       I think there should be a trebuchet class. I volunteer to teach it. I'll have to make sure it's far from the petting zoo, or devise an anti-flinging device for Amy. Children don't always have the best judgement.
—Worldgineer, Jul 22 2004
   

       What about a troll self-defense class?
—swimr, Jul 22 2004
   

       And how to protect the kids against radio-activity? I imagine it as a huge stretch of land with a monorail kind of transportation. The weather is made totally inpredictable also. In the distance you regularly see mushrooms of a-bombs. I think DrBob is right... As a movie then?
—rrr, Jul 23 2004
   

       I volunteered to be a student as I have no kids and have learned plenty from certain halfbakery regulars. My annotation was deleted. Next thing you know [rrr] will take away my paste, completely ruining my lunch.
—half, Jul 23 2004
   

       lots of familiar faces in the special class...
—lintkeeper2, Jul 23 2004
   

       Well there sure are a lot of creative people with functional specialties. Unfortunately, kids wouldn't find contract law too appealing :-( And, judging by how my ideas have generally gone down, neither to my associate instructor contemporaries.
—contracts, Jul 23 2004
   

       I like [zen_tom]s anno. Beautifully written, an impertinent little play that tantilizes the senses with a promise of more to come.   

       this is what happens when I have too much free time.
—dentworth, Jul 23 2004
   

       I'm weeding the garden tomorrow, but going spearfishing next weekend.
—normzone, Jul 23 2004
   
      
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