h a l f b a k e r yThe Out-of-Focus Group.
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Massage our patented hackle-lowering cream into the back of your neck, and feel anger and worries slip away! Road rage, teen angst, and pointy-haired-boss-defenestritus are no match for this scientfically proven compound made of space-age meta-lubricants, sub-tropical tracheophytes, and cricket lips.
Hackles guaranteed to drop 10, 15, even 25% in altitude! Hackle-lowering cream comes in Apricot, Pine-Sol, and Manly Gymtastic scents. Order now, and we'll throw in a genuine bamboo back-scratcher for free!
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...and makes a lovely shoulder chip dip. |
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Does it also release recently acquired goats? Because this really gets mine. |
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What in hell is a hackle? |
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I could actually do this, but it would probably also convince you of your ability to fly and temporarily paralyse you. |
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[blissmiss] hackles are the hairs on the back of an animals neck that raise when they want you to back off. |
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But but but then how does the author know how it feels to have your "hackles" lowered? I so confused. |
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I think they are metaphorical hackles, but the hair on the back of a human neck raises when when in fight or flight mode too. er...at least mine do. I assume I'm not the only one. |
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<makes mental note to stop assuming that> |
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