h a l f b a k e r yMy hatstand runneth over
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The recently-discussed-here London Eye is not, really, an
eye, is it? I mean, it's round, but that is about as eyeey as
it gets.
It is very much more a hamster wheel, which means that it
is clearly lacking one vital component.
What is needed, therefore, is a mechanimatronic Giant
Hamster.
Said Giant Hamster will have to be rather
disproportionately narrow to fit between the two sets of
radial, spoke-like cables. But, if any nation can rise to the
challenge of producing a disproportionately narrow
mechanimatronic Giant Hamster, it is surely this sceptre'd
isle.
Said hamster should, of course, be self-propelling. The
current drive mechanism (which acts by bearing on the
wheel's rim) can be removed, and the remotely-controlled
Giant Hamster can instead drive the wheel's revolution by
lolloping.
Kitten Kong - the goodies
https://www.youtube...watch?v=Jr6CyU-Ev_M [not_morrison_rm, May 23 2016]
Maybe with enough of them...
20_2c000_20Hamster_20Dyno [RayfordSteele, May 23 2016]
Elegy
http://www.chestert...country-churchyard/ Still true today. [8th of 7, May 25 2016]
Giant Hamster Spotted in London
https://www.instagram.com/p/BF3pVqQg3ot/ It's on its way..... [xenzag, May 26 2016]
Trump + Clinton = Trumpton
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Trumpton [MaxwellBuchanan, May 27 2016]
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The London Eye is 120m in diameter. Based on current data, this extrapolates to a self-propelled mechatronc hamster 80m long and 30m high at the shoulder. |
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No sunflower seed in the Universe would be safe. |
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To avoid the risk of hamster droppings 2m long and 0.5m diameter littering the South Bank, the only realistic energy source is a pair of pressurised water fission reactors. |
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So, you're proposing to build an autonomous eighty metre long nuclear-powered hamster and let it loose in the centre of a major population centre, a stone's throw from the seat of government of one of the members of the UN security council, and in line of sight of one of your planet's major financial and commercial hubs ? |
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Excellent, go ahead. After all, what could possibly go wrong ? |
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I'm guessing you have never seen a mechanimatronic
Giant Hamster. |
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Not one that's eighty metres long and powered by fission reactors, no. |
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Regular sized (3 to 5 metre long) Giant Hamsters admittedly do tend to lumber rather than scuttle. Quite why they're so popular as pets, what with the thick, wrinkled grey skin, huge tusks, flapping ears and weird prehensile noses is inexplicable. They don't even bark at burglars... |
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//To avoid the risk of ...// |
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It's still going to need to be able to excrete used lubricants, excess
pigeons, plastic bags, &c. |
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Perhaps a Rodent Of Unusual Size could substitute? |
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Perhaps they could build a giant wooden rabbit ... ? |
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Or it could be an opportunity for the Giant Rat of Sumatra to make a comeback. |
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//Regular sized (3 to 5 metre long) Giant Hamsters// |
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I believe you are thinking of Pygmy Giant Hamsters,
native to Flores, where the island environment
caused a progressive diminution in size over several
hundreds of generations. (Curiously, the same island
is also host to the Giant Pygmy fruitbats.) |
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a bit of a difference in speed between a hamster wheel and the eye. |
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...as well as the torque. |
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Maybe my 20,000 hamster dyno could help? |
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//a bit of a difference in speed// |
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Now, you see, if you'd raised that point _before_ the
inaugural ceremony it would have fine. |
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+ I like this...of course the hamster should get tea time breaks,though. |
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That's a Shrew-d insight, [IT]. |
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If someone bought fake tickets for this, would it be
a London Eye icon con? |
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Yes, and if there was a large meeting for victims, it would be a London Eye icon con done con. |
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This would raise the London Highbrow eye-brow |
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I googled up the London Eye. One could easily thread strips of LEDS down the spokes and create a simulated blinking eye. Possibly a blinking Evil Eye to glare balefully at the enemies of England. |
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That would be the Houses of Parliament, then. |
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Surely her Majesty's Government is unblinking? |
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I think it should have the support structure modified
to be supported on the left and right, and have the
LEDs do a roughly firey-cats eye shape that can be
seen from Wales. Maybe some runes scribed in,
too. |
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If you want the Eye of Sauron, being the embodiment of all evil, glaring at the British government, then the most appropriate place to put it would be on the top of the Eiffel tower. |
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That would be geographically correct too, because Mordor is south-east of the Shire. |
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And decribed as bleak, desolate and full of hordes of hideous, evil sub-human creatures. So yes, france. |
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Oddly, Donald Trump isn't welcome there, either. |
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//the enemies of England. |
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//Donald Trump isn't welcome there, either// I hear he's welcome any time in North Korea. |
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I am so glad the Trumpster has win the nomination -
the fight between him and Clinton will be hilarious -
perhaps we should call it Trumpton? |
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In any event, one of them is bound to get in, and
that will be the funniest thing that has ever
happened. |
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