h a l f b a k e r yBreakfast of runners-up.
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Many folk enjoy the majestic sight of Canada geese winging
through the sky in formation. Nice! And many folk enjoy
getting a closer look at these magnifcent creatures as they
rest in parklands along the way. Perhaps they even toss
some bread to them and bask in the warm charitable glow,
and/or
watch them squabble and honk to get the crusts.
Nice! And many folk trying to take a walk through the park
step in slimy green goose poop as they innocently wander
down paved paths. Not nice!
Enter the Gentle Goose Gitoff. This system works on the
same principle as an electric fence, providing a gentle
shock to encourage animals to leave.
Unlike an electric fence, it's low and discontinuous - a
bunch of little poles, eerily similar to path lights of
those round pulleys that are supposed to make it easier to
drag a garden hose around corners and actually provide a
wonderful place for the hose to knot and then chip up when
you forget they're there and run over them with a
lawnmower. Place them along the sides of any hard path
surface where geese might otherwise wander, at careful
intervals such that geese cannot push between them, but
humans can step between them (or over them).
Geese will still inhabit the parks. But they will not
inhabit the paths. Unless they happen to land there, but
then perhaps the lack of food will drive them to take off
again. We hope. A trapped, angry goose is not a pretty
sight.
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this title is so ambiguous. |
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I am intrigued by the GGGG, in all its manifestations. Bun for ambiguity, earnestness and gentle gentility. |
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