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Looks like a normal clock, perhaps a little gaudy but otherwise harmless in appearance. Every hour a mis-shapen dwarf -like creature shoots out of a portal and delivers a puerile one-word insult. At random intervals and for no apparent reason, the creature re-appears and launches into a complete rant
about nothing in particular.
On the deluxe version, the feature can be turned off if required, via an infra red remote switch in the form of a 12-bore shotgun, to the accompaniment of a large gout of blue and purple flame and an enormous bang. Only works once.
Thanks to [UB] for unwitting inspiration.
[link]
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I'll take a full case, and two boxes of shotgun shells. |
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I want one. As long as you can shut it up at night. How would you ensure a good variety of rants? Perhaps it could have an internet connection to download editorials from right-wing newspaper columnists. |
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A cuckoo clock with tourette's syndrome? I want one! |
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No, no, it's a troll, not an owl! |
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Mmm...Milk...slice of bread, anyone? |
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