Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Gargulant

The stimulating gargle!
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I've noticed that when I have a problem with phlegm buildup in the throat, stimulants seem to help remove it when gargled. So far I've done it with Coke, black tea, and Mountain Dew. I believe it's the caffeine that's removing the phlegm from the walls of the throat. I've tried it with regular water and salt water, and they don't seem to work nearly as well as drinks that contain caffeine (I've not tried other stimulants). But gargling soda and tea aren't good, as they can stain and rot your teeth.

So my proposed solution is a gargling solution consisting simply of water and caffeine, with a VERY high caffeine content. It can have more caffeine than sodas and energy drinks, which are limited in their content due to safety concerns, and you'll be fine using it, because you don't swallow it. Just gargle and spit. It won't rot your teeth, it won't stain your teeth, and it can serve as a pick-me-up in a pinch if you're driving at night or burning the midnight oil at work.

I've searched extensively online, and haven't found anything like this anything like this. There is a bottled sports drink that claims to be just water and caffeine, with an ingredient that neutralizes the caffeine taste, but it's intended for consumption. It also appears that caffeine is proven to have a positive effect when gargled in the form of green tea as a remedy for strep throat. Apparently, viruses don't like it any more than phlegm does.

21 Quest, Sep 17 2009

the goood stuff http://purecaffeine.info
commercial "legal high" site [FlyingToaster, Sep 17 2009]

Wyeth v Levine http://www.24-7pres...ter-pill-113836.php
Supreme Court says warning label not sufficient [lurch, Sep 18 2009]


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Annotation:







       Limit of solubility is ~2g/100ml. Very strong stuff that.
daseva, Sep 17 2009
  

       Can I just mention that, out of all the words in the English and American languages, "phlegm" is the one I loathe, hate and despise the most.
MaxwellBuchanan, Sep 17 2009
  

       //Limit of solubility is ~2g/100ml. Very strong stuff that//
  

       //..."phlegm" is the one I loathe, hate and despise the most.//
  

       I heartily agree, Max. I'd also like to mention that I pronounce it "fleggum", as it should be given the spelling.
  

       And yeah, 2 g of caffeine would be VERY strong. A normal cup of coffee contains, what, 200 mg? That's the amount they pack into most caffeine pills.
21 Quest, Sep 17 2009
  

       I think you might find that it's the acidity of the drink, not the caffeine. There is such a low concentration of caffeine in these drinks that I couldn't see it being the solvent.
  

       Try gargling vinegar or pineapple juice, see if they have a similar effect, I think you'll find they do - just no caffeine.
Custardguts, Sep 17 2009
  

       But those are Baked. And they can't function as an emergency super-stimulant.
21 Quest, Sep 17 2009
  

       Gargulant - Now with 50 % more Arugala than before !!!
normzone, Sep 17 2009
  

       I was going to put a rant in here about experimental analysis, isolating variables, drawing appropriate conclusions given sufficient evidence, and making appropriate assumptions. But I just end up sounding like a twat, as I do here.
  

       Suffice to say that when comparing the material group A (coke, mountain dew and black tea) to group B (water, salt water) - the biggest difference I see is not caffeine content. Likewise when we put in the unrelated material group C (green tea). In fact I'd argue that you don't have enough data yet.
  

       By the way, phlegm buildup is largely a dehydration issue. Maybe the problem is too much caffeine in the first place?
Custardguts, Sep 17 2009
  

       //But those are Baked. And they can't function as an emergency super-stimulant//
  

       True, true. But I bet they clear your phlegm (which was, I beleive your main aim) - which I'm pretty sure you'll find that [water+caffeine] won't.
Custardguts, Sep 17 2009
  

       Tell ya what... I'll go to the store tomorrow and buy some caffeine pills, grind them up, and add water, and let you know how it goes.
21 Quest, Sep 17 2009
  

       ..... Don't swallow!
  

       Also remember that those tablets are something like 99% supposedly inert filler. So you're still not getting a purely caffeine-water mix...
Custardguts, Sep 17 2009
  

       You want to Halfbake me up a caffeine powder centrifuge, then?
21 Quest, Sep 17 2009
  

       <link> but you can get the same effect by soaking some tea bags in cold water: the caffeine doesn't require boiling water to dissolve. From an anno [MB] on another idea, it seems that caffeine dissolves in ethanol as well so you can get 2 dehydrants working for you.
FlyingToaster, Sep 17 2009
  

       You can CO2(l) extract caffeine - so I'm guessing you can probably extract it with liquid butane as well.
  

       May extract more than just the caffeine.
Custardguts, Sep 17 2009
  

       "..."phlegm" is the one I loathe, hate and despise the most."
Don't like the vowel/consonant ratio?
phoenix, Sep 17 2009
  

       //a VERY high caffeine content. It can have more caffeine than sodas and energy drinks, which are limited in their content due to safety concerns, and you'll be fine using it, because you don't swallow it.// Wait till students and long distance drivers get hold of it. "no, of course I'd never drink this stuff. Do you think I am stupid?"...
pocmloc, Sep 18 2009
  

       I'm well aware of that fact. See the second half of the last sentence of the second paragraph of the post. That's what warning labels are for. Liability protection.
21 Quest, Sep 18 2009
  

       soooo sadly wrong their my friend. labels are at best a weak protection against liability.
WcW, Sep 18 2009
  

       //That's what warning labels are for. Liability protection.// Wyeth just lost that argument before the Supreme Court; see link.
lurch, Sep 18 2009
  

       Uh, you're wrong about that, buddy. You don't see the makers of Scope and Listerine mouthwash getting sued when people get sick from swallowing it, or getting shut down by the Feds, and they've been around for ages. Or at least, if they are getting sued they aren't losing.
  

       Edit: I was responding to WcW, not you, Lurch. The case you mention involved physician-administered medication designed to enter the body. My product is simply a mouthwash, and the label would specifically prohibit ingestion or sale to minors, as well as being labelled with all the standard caffeine-safety warnings.
21 Quest, Sep 18 2009
  

       //manufacturers of highly caffeinated chocolates and tablets are FREQUENTLY SUED//
  

       Again, smartass, those are products that are *intended and marketed* for consumption. They are supposed to be safe to ingest. The trouble arises when people have different tolerance levels. My product is clearly not intended for consumption, and would be labeled accordingly. You're comparing two completely different classes of products. Quit being such a troll already.
21 Quest, Sep 19 2009
  

       i stand behind the statement that warning labels do not protect you from liability if injury occurs when a user uses a product in a way the manufacturer "knows it is likely that they might" and has not done due diligence to prevent it. Labels, like waivers of liability do little to protect you if your product is readily misused.
  

       "do not make Methamphetamine out of this cough syrup"
  

       "do not drink this gargle and then try to dance the night away"
  

       "this baby stroller to be used on flat level ground only"
WcW, Sep 19 2009
  

       Strong infusion of Acacia catechu would probably do it.

[MB], you have to be phlegmatic about it.
nineteenthly, Sep 19 2009
  


 

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