h a l f b a k e r yInvented by someone French.
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Ever since I moved out (first to university, and now my first
job) my mom has called me at least 4 times a week. Most of
the time she mentions some awful story she saw on the
news
"Young girl found in trash can." "3 young women vanish at
bus
station." "Goggly eye'd rapist on the loose." Every
time she
reads about one of these stories she calls me to tell me that
I'm in "danger" and to check if my door is locked.
The solution? A publication filled with statics about how safe
most of americas young women are. Stories like "Student
reads
all night." and "Young woman buys CDs and Newspaper." and
"No rapists found in dark ally."
I could buy a subscription for my mom and then she'd have
lower blood pressure. This could save lives!!
A young men's version should also be available.
Kate Adie - War Correspondent
http://www.bbc.co.uk/insights/adie.shtml
A role-model for frightened mothers? [Aristotle, Jul 18 2001, last modified Oct 04 2004]
[link]
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I would get my mother a subscription. Really good idea. Croissant for you! |
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I tell my mom that I jog during the day with a armed (gay)
guard and two german shepherds... |
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Of course FMW as described would be too boring to read, so to hold your mother's interest, there should be tittilating stories full of lurid details about the dangers of watching or reading sensationalistic "news" stories: "Unwary Mother is Attacked by Giant Radioactive Fruit Flies While Watching/Reading [Insert show or tabloid here]." |
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No, because if my mom knew how much I used the net I'd
get a phone call for all of those stories about "identity
theft" and "young girl lured into ally by THE INTERNET" too
... |
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I worry about my mother. She's getting up in years, you see, and there are so many predatory barstids that take advantage of older folks...I better giver her a phone call right now...No, maybe I'll just read a bit from "Frightened Son's Weekly," it's so reassuring... |
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Mephista: You are not Kate Adie, AKA the 5th Horsewoman of the Apocalypse, by any chance? (see link) |
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I wouldn't mind my mother calling if she was just calling to
say hi but instead she's all worried. And I know she tries
NOT to call so she's worried even when she's not calling
me. I just don't want her to be worried. Also if I happen
to leave my cell phone off for a day or two she goes
through the roof. (she called the police once to tell them
I
was missing ...) I just want her to be calm and maybe
worry about her flower garden or that ski club she runs
instead of me all the time... |
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Until she opens up the copy of Unpopular Science mailed to her by mistake. |
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The war correspondent idea isn't so good, because then
*I'd* have to call my mother every day, maybe "Frightened
Daughters of Formerly-Frighted-Now-War-Correspondening
Mothers-Weekly" can also be available. |
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NF (News Flash, or No Fun) -- This Just In |
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Largest multi-agency tactical sweep of the most dangerous U.S. city recovers one discarded knife and a missing pair of sneakers found in a city park. An internet lead is under investigation, but expanding the search to Ybor City has been ruled out. |
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Speculation is rampant that if the missing girl is found, she won't be in very good shape for her disappearance. |
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If I was my mother, I wouldn't trust my roommates or boyfriends to look after me. Quite the opposite. |
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Mephista, I don't mean to say that my mother shouldn't be trusting my boyfriends and roommates to look after me. She might as well, but that's not the point. My dad, who is far more the worrier, is completely satisfied that they brought me up to be an outgoing, fun-loving, risk-taking girl, yet that I have quite enough sense to know what I'm doing. I won't be jogging in parks late at night with my walkman on, and I won't be taking unmarked taxis ("minicabs" - UK) home on my own. They know this and they trust it. My parents know that there's no need for my boyfriends or roommates to be 'looking after' me because I'm quite able to do that myself. Only last weekend I realised it was 3.30am and I was somewhere on Broad Street and all the pubs were closed. My friends were nowhere to be found and there was a black hole where my memory of the past three hours should have been. I won't say what I did next, but hey look - here I am, I've lived to tell the tale. Strangely enough, I was in a strip joint on the same street exactly a week later, with all my friends there too. My point is that I looked after myself far better in the first example than the latter, yet it was the latter that should have been more 'safe', since my friends were there too. I guess you've gotta know who your kids' friends are! (And incidentally, I doubt you'd trust me with your sons - most of my boyfriends' mothers think I'm sweet and lovely, ah, how misguided they are!!) |
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<grins> I'm getting to want to meet you more and more... |
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futurebird: Kate Adie is the archetypal female war correspondent here in the UK, which is why I mentioned her. It's simply not a proper war unless Kate Adie has arrived ... |
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[lewisgirl] That night you had the blackout wasn't the night you sent all those rude annotations to the HalfBakery was it? :-) |
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