Free Range Gorillas

As man invades the remaining bastions of security enjoyed by many of Earth's creatures, we are putting enormous pressure on them and rendering many of them extinct.

The solution, so far unsuccessful, has been to set aside special reserves for these critters, so we can have David Attenborough toddle along every so often with a camera crew and make some breathtaking documentary about how baby tigers can rend a baby Indian child limb from limb.

Under the Free Range Gorillas program we will set up a breeding population of Mountain Gorillas or Siberian Tigers or Purple-patched Patagonian Potato Weevils in your district, depending upon climate constraints, and run an advertising and civic pride campaign to ensure a smooth transition for the wee beasties.

In exchange, the BBC will wheel David Attenborough (or the new animatronic DA, once this one wears out) through your town every so often, to film you and your adopted wildlife creche and pump up tourism for your local economy.