Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
h a l f b a k e r y
Almost as great as sliced bread.

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Fortune Cookie Fireworks

Combining the two greatest achievements of Chinese civilisation.
  (+9, -1)(+9, -1)
(+9, -1)
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A big firework. It goes up, up, up and explodes, showering the onlookers with fortune cookies.
hippo, Nov 04 2001

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       I thought this was the other way round, you take a bite of a biscuit and it blows all your loose teeth out
po, Nov 04 2001
  

       Isn't this kinda what the USAF are currently up to over the skies of Afghanistan?
DrBob, Nov 04 2001
  

       Good point, [DrBob].
(By the way - burnt any good effigies of the Pope recently?)
hippo, Nov 04 2001
  

       Mmmmmmmmmm wise and exploding
kaz, Nov 04 2001
  

       I was also expecting it to be the other way around.
"Today you will be very lucky" Arrrgghh! My frickin' eye!
CoolerKing, Nov 04 2001
  

       Anyone notice that this is the only bomb idea with at least a piece of a croissant? Considering this is pretty silly (no offense), how bad must the others be?   

       [Oh, darn, some others got croissanted after I wrote this...]
magnificat, Nov 05 2001
  

       meow
po, Nov 05 2001
  

       Read them and find out (if you dare).
CoolerKing, Nov 05 2001
  

       [UnaBubba] Oh alright, paper was quite an acheivement I suppose. Also porcelain and a few other things. I'm not sure if the 5000 continuous years of civilisation continued through Mao's "Great Leap Forward", but that's just my opinion...
hippo, Nov 05 2001
  

       [UnaBubba] A firework which explodes, showering onlookers with toilets would (a) probably be too too big for home use, and (b) have other disadvantages.
hippo, Nov 05 2001
  

       It's raining toilets again! Everybody into the bunker! Damn that estate agent for not mentioning the firework testing range next door.
CoolerKing, Nov 05 2001
  

       Fireworks & toilet paper has been baked (Hallowe'en). I suppose this is just the logical next step.
stupop, Nov 05 2001
  

       Just a thought, but wern't fortune cookies invented in New York? I would rather see the wet noodle bomb [PeterSealy] was talking about.
barnzenen, Nov 05 2001
  

       A big firework. It goes up, up, up and explodes, showering the onlookers with fortune cookies, in bed.   

       Incidentally, I lived in China for two years, and not once did I ever get a fortune cookie with my meals.
Guncrazy, Nov 05 2001
  

       It's true, fortune cookies really don't exist outside of the States. There are a very few Chinese restaurants in the UK that still sell them, but they are a predominantly USian thing.   

       Combining China's 2 greatest achievements: A firework goes up, explodes and showers copies of the I Ching over onlookers (but only because sparky beat me to the Great Wall of China)
CoolerKing, Nov 05 2001
  

       I can't believe [AfroAssault] hasn't chimed in yet...
phoenix, Nov 05 2001
  

       I wish you had told me about the wheat earlier, my sister just got married a couple of weeks ago.
barnzenen, Nov 06 2001
  

       PeterSealy , Cook it first, it's much softer
dare99, Nov 06 2001
  

       But don't use rice pudding (particularly the canned variety).
angel, Nov 06 2001
  

       Your Fortune: Friendship cleans doorsteps. Lucky Numbers: 8--1,563,832--24--1/2--0--666
zaphod12, Nov 06 2001
  

       kisses?
lewisgirl, Nov 06 2001
  

       I assumed from the title that when the firework burst it spelled out a fortune in the sky. "He who look up now have ash in eye," or some such. Yeah, stupid.
bristolz, Nov 06 2001
  

       Huh. Not bad, hippo, not bad at all. I'd vote for such a silly idea, but I think 10 is enough.
absterge, Nov 07 2001
  

       "Rice, I say, fill em up with all that leftover rice, and viola.....a feast for all."   

       Cello! a feast for all! Ukelele! a feast for all! Shamisen! a feast for all!   

       Perhaps the idea is to fill the firework with violas.   

       I love typos that actually mean something...
magnificat, Jan 29 2002
  

       Exploding toilets? That reminds me of a certain work of modern art I once saw. It looked like a few stopped-up toilets blew up all over a wall. Not a pretty sight!
magnificat, Jan 29 2002
  
      
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