Fliegenspiel

Back in the days when people and humour were simpler, various wags and wits proposed musical instruments based on animals such as pigs or cats. The theory was that you would select cats (or pigs) based on the pitch of their calls, and arrange for mallets to strike their tails, under the control of a piano-like keyboard. My, how we laughed.

Unfortunately, it is extremely difficult to tune a cat or a pig reliably*. They are sensitive to humidity, hunger and many other parameters. Moreovermore, the width of such animals would make a full 88-note keyboard unwieldly.

So.

If you dismantle a flying insect, you'll discover that its wingbeats are controlled by a resonant system consisting of a springy ligament and a flight muscle. The system only works at (or very close to) its resonant frequency, which is why most flies, wasps, bees and beetles produce a fairly constant note when airborne. The pitch changes a bit with temperature, and can be varied a little for banking and pitching, but not by much.

Clearly, then, the opportunity exists to create a fliegenspiele. Some research will be needed to find a collection of insects which, between them, can span the full audio spectrum. However, individual Peltier modules in each insect-containing chamber will allow fine tuning.

All that is then needed is some means of actuating each insect in response to the relevant key. The word "laser" springs to mind at this point.

From the deep bass of the male cockchafer (no, stop it!), to the crystalline warble of the mosquito - a full multioctave experience awaits.

[*violinists are a prime example of this problem, and they are only using part of the cat.]