Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Fibre-optics for blondes

Dazzling!
  (+12, -1)(+12, -1)
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Blonde (and blond) hairs can act as slightly-efficient fibre-optic threads: this is how laser hair removal works (the hair conducts a lot of the laser energy back into the follicle, and fries it). Thanks to MaxCo HairCair, this process can now be exploited in reverse to dazzle your friends!

The operation is simple and straightforward. The scalp is first peeled back (under anaesthetic, if you choose), and a simple routing procedure is used to create a meshwork of grooves in the skull. Into these grooves is laid a miniaturized net of LED rope-lights in the colour(s) of your choosing. The pickup coils for the trans-dermal induction power supply and controllers can be installed in the location of your choice. The scalp is then re-fitted.

With the press of a button, you can select one of more than several exciting light displays! The subcutaneous LEDs will transmit their light through the hair follicles and outward to the ends of the hair shafts, giving you that 1970's fibreoptic lamp effect. Ripple, spiral, wave, random and blinking modes are pre-programmed. Or purchase the MaxCo HairCair LED Display Programmer to create your own patterns, or even to scroll messages across your coiffure. Works best with short hair.

MaxwellBuchanan, Apr 15 2009

https://www.costume...ge/Rubies/50962.jpg I have my look picked out. [tatterdemalion, Apr 15 2009]

(?) or this? http://www.partykio...d-purple-2445-p.asp
I want one [dentworth, Apr 16 2009]

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       Sounds like a reasonable proceedure.... I'll take it! I always fancied being a table lamp +
xenzag, Apr 15 2009
  

       Fringe science, if ever there was.   

       Given an uneven topology for end points, how would your processor ever account for the tassle-lation from the scalp as viewed as a a smooth 3-sphere.   

       Or are we relying on Occam's Razor? I would, as you would, prefer this area of topology to be *cut and dried*, but can we really, without mousse-ing out on the important issues. I would like some time to Mullet over.
4whom, Apr 15 2009
  

       Ah, Halfbakery puns. They're to dye for.
MaxwellBuchanan, Apr 15 2009
  

       Gentlemen prefer bulbs.
xenzag, Apr 15 2009
  

       ..and blondes come from Venus.
skinflaps, Apr 15 2009
  

       Ah, and every time you have an idea...
phoenix, Apr 16 2009
  

       ... God kills a kitten?!
zen_tom, Apr 16 2009
  

       [bigsleep] I was hoping your pun would last. I suppose it was a bit off-colour. I guess I missed a trichos, or two, there. Anyhow, it all comes out in the wash.
4whom, Apr 17 2009
  


 

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