Elephantine Tube surfing zoo

Whilst pondering how to make going on the Tube less of a tedious ordeal, I was struck by the possibilities of gaining more Zoo space for possibly rare and endangered species.

I had originally just envisaged some kind of surf board for commuters, with iron rods through it, loosely connected to a wagon. The wagon would ride the rails and the by electromagetism cause the surfboard to bob up and down in a vaguely realistic fashion as it goes along the Bakerloo line (for example). By scaling up the aforementioned board and putting bars on the wagon it should be possible to propel, for example, an elephant with modest surfing abilities around the Circle Line more or less indefinitely, so freeing up space in the Zoo for more elephants, or other species.

Obviously, the current control would have to be fail-safed to avoid Dumbo being accelerated to near light speed and it all ending up in tears at Aldgate East.

The sight of animals surfing around the Tube would brighten up the daily commute for Londoners, children could carry animal pic books and get a sticker for each animal they spot, and the cost could be offset by sellling the footage of sloths migrating along the Piccadilly line to the BBC.

Hmm, seemed funnier before I started typing...I remain etc currently in Tokyo and only lightly glowing in the dark.