h a l f b a k e r yQuis custodiet the custard?
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reaching for the ketchup, you know theres gonna be a problem getting that essential dollop. Yeah sure, everyone has their own superstitious way of overcoming this - pat on the base, pat on the neck, go at it with a knife etc. What would really solve this ongoing issue would be to redesign the bottle
itelf. Sure, theres the squeezy bottle, and its great....but the glass....oh dear! So i suggest the glass bottles should be fitted with a one-way valve on the base of the bottle to allow for air to get in when open and held upside down. hence the ketchup wold flow freely out of the bottle and allow the popular condiment to be added hasstle free.
Squeezable Bottles
http://www.pechiney...df/Ketchup_20oz.pdf Just use one of these [suctionpad, Oct 04 2004]
the wait is over
http://www.foxnews....ix-ketchup-problem/ [theircompetitor, May 23 2012]
Slightly irrelevant but look what happens to the flower when you scroll up and down
http://www.environm...quence-seen-flowers [Phrontistery, May 24 2012]
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I'm not sure this would help. The air vent is usually a solution to the problem of uneven flow (glug glug glug), whereas I think the ketchup problem is just one of slow flow. Any volunteers to go drill a hole in their ketchup bottle and see if it works? No vote until I'm convinced. |
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Why not just redesign the ketchup. |
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Have a 2 part mix with runny components that get thicker when mixed in the nozzle/mouth of the bottle. They could look quite nice too...a bit like Sheridans liquer. |
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Hang a hose with a rubber bulb (think blood-pressure cuff) on the side of the glass ketchup bottle. Have a valve in the dispenser end. To use, tip the dispenser end down, pump up the pressure (keep an eye on the guage - too much will bury the burger) and ease the valve open. When done, vent. |
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OK with the LiquiGlide stuff, but can it stand up to the acidity of ketchup for months on end? Maybe it will dissolve away? |
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Maybe every bottle could be fitted with a vibrator motor, the vibration creating liquefaction in ketchups solid-particulate-liquid mix (like dirt in earthquakes). |
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Or perhaps diners can have centrifuges at the center of the counters, to force all the kethcup to the top.
If you're bored, you can hold a bottle and spin it really fast, and all the stuff'll go to the top. You'd be surprised how fast you can spin a bottle if you really try. |
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Has anyone considered adding a splash of
water/oil/vodka/whatever floats your boat and
shaking the bottle? |
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Or, more randomly, hiring 3 mahouts complete with
elephants trained to sit on those circus elephant
tubs... Atop each tub is a plastic bottle - one each
for mustard, ketchup and brown sauce. As each
elephants sits, a squirt of sauce jets out and, if
you're nippy enough with your plate, you get your
condiment of choice served by your very own
condimelephant. |
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