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Earthquake Fun Scale
"Today's earthquake measured a 4.5 on the Richter and a solid 7.0 on the Fun scale!" | |
I live in earthquake country and I'll tell you, earthquakes can
be pretty fun. Nobody has ever talked about this as far as I
know but after an Earthquake there's almost a giddiness
among the people who felt it. Comparing stories, talking
about those dishes that fell from the shelves or the way
the
dogs in the neighborhood started barking, car alarms going
off etc. Some earthquakes are fun, some obviously not so
much.
To be clear, any earthquake where somebody is hurt is a solid
0.0 on the fun scale, but one where nobody is hurt and
everybody gets to take some time out of the day and
compare notes, get out of work or school for a few hours
would be a solid 8.0.
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Annotation:
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All the Californians are voting... |
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//any earthquake where somebody is hurt is a
solid
0.0 on the fun scale// |
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I'm pretty sure that any earthquake large enough
to
be enjoyable will also injure someone - falling
chimney-pots; hot coffee in crotch; collapse of
skyscraper - that kind of thing. I mean, even
amusement parks kill people once in a while. |
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The offset needs to
be set a little higher. |
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No, that's all part of the joy of the Richter scale - type approach. |
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Well, funny injuries don't deduct and might even add
to the fun scale number. Pie accidentally smashed in
the
face, big fat guy dropping a bowling ball on his foot,
snooty rich guy getting splashed by dropping his
monocle in his champagne glass. The ideal
earthquake turns any situation into a Three Stooges
bit. |
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San Francisco is full of annoying artists. I'm picturing
a guy with a beret and an ascot holding a paintbrush
an inch away from his canvas featuring a
Picassoesque Rembranty portrait of a woman with
about 10% Monet thrown in. "Vis ze last stroke I finish
ze masterpiece!" The the rumbling and shaking starts
and he draws a mustache on her. That's a solid 9.0
right there. |
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//Picassoesque Rembranty// |
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I'm not sure that any earthquake large enough to be enjoyable will also injure someone. We were in Tokyo on holiday just after the big Fukushima earthquake and we saw no damage in Tokyo despite it having suffered a big earthquake (just one museum closed - an old building - but that was it). We were there for a week and there were big aftershocks every day, but no structural damage to anything, and no one seemed concerned (Even when we had an earthquake when were on a subway train which was stopped at a station deep underground, with the train carriage rocking from side to side, no one looked even slightly alarmed). |
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They cover earthquakes pretty well here. People are
encouraged to call radio and tv stations to tell their
stories and I believe hospitals and emergency services
officially report damage and injuries as well as part
of standard protocol. The best calls are ones that ask
the reporter what they're wearing or make a
comment about Howard Stern's private parts. |
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//I'm pretty sure that any earthquake large enough
to be enjoyable will also injure someone// |
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Fun and injury are clearly linked: Fireworks,
Spitfires, Motorcycles, Flaming Sambucas, Lion
Poking, Gasoline fights, anything involving a
waterfall and a barrel. |
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Also, fun countries are dangerous, and safe ones
aren't much fun. Brazil and Belgium, for example.
The key, with both activities and countries, is
finding the sweet spot where the fun pay off
comes at a relatively low risk price. |
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A moderate earthquake also has the advantage of
being free-at-the-point-of-delivery, unlike
Spitfires or drinking. |
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Back in '97-'98, we had a big ice storm in Maine. It went on
for weeks. Hundreds of thousands of people went without
power and thousands without heat as well. People came
together and pooled resources and for a month or so we
lived in a perfect communist society orchestrated by local
radio stations. It was even on CNN for a couple of minutes. |
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Everyone who remembers the Ice Storm of '98 has a hatful
of stories, and we all sit around and tell them on hot
summer afternoons when the only snow for miles around
comes in cone form. Except for the people who died of CO
poisoning from gas generators or lost limbs to frostbite or
were horribly maimed in roof collapses, the storm was a
grand adventure that left us with fond memories of
togetherness and the righteous satisfaction of surviving
great adversity. |
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Some of us even had a good time. |
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Of course nothing comes close to the fun of a massive
thunderstorm that knocks the lights out. You get the
primal excitement of the tribe gathering together in
time of "crisis" without any real danger. |
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I think there's evidence that people can thrive in
crises situations. I've heard people who lived through
certain parts of WW2 that said it was the most alive
they've ever felt. Obviously it wasn't that way for the
people getting killed, but those who strove and
survived sometimes speak of the experience as
almost religious. |
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I'm fascinated with evidence of our caveman past
that pokes through in modern life. I think there's
probably chemicals that the brain releases to keep us
up to task during crisis situations. Like the brain says
"You're going to be fighting for your life in a second,
how about a little shot of something to take the edge
off?" It's like having a friendly sympathetic bartender
built into your head. |
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//I've heard people who lived through certain parts
of WW2 that said it was the most alive they've ever
felt// |
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You only live twice: Once when you are born. And
once when you look death in the face (You Only Live
Twice, Chapter 11) |
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//(You Only Live Twice, Chapter 11)// |
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(Bows head and genuflects) So sayeth the almighty
Bond. |
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Schadenfreude? Fun for who? |
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As a Californian who travels, I know several regions where
people will smile when California falls down. Even, or ESP.
If death occurs |
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That said, yes we need to laugh & have fun more |
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[Alter] See how much fun socialism can be? [tongue
extracted from cheek] |
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Preaching to the choir, [Ray]. If I had my druthers our
economy would be a loosely regulated barter system and
all forms of speculation would be prohibited. So would
centrally-controlled credit systems and lots of the other
sneaky shit the politicians and bankers have made legal
when nobody was looking. I've hated money since I was old
enough to understand it, but it's a necessary evil if I want
to stay in the country I love. |
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[soph], As California is a tax donor state, they won't
be smiling for long. |
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[rayfordsteel]. Sure they can & will still smile. From recent
history, the states paying less tax than the benefits they
collect are saturated with cognitive dissonance & embrace
myths & untruths as they consider facts & science "elitist" |
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Sorry I was talking poorly about the south USA, where I
spent some time. I also spent time in Detroit, & they are a
bit wiser there in spite of the horrible challenges they've
faced for the last 50 years. I'd rather have a big
earthquake which we can recover from in 3 years , even
stronger, than face 50+ years of racial strife & disfunction |
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