Drunk Crèche

It's a well known fact that drunk people feel very suppressed, which is why they decide to go on crazy crime sprees and steal useless objects such as traffic cones and stop signs. What they need is a way to expend all this extra energy.

A drunk creche could be an area of a bar set aside in a similar way to a fast food restaurant's kids play area. It needn't be free either, as someone drunk enough to want to use this would probably be willing to pay extortionate prices. Alternatively it could be a separate business in itself.

A brightly coloured wonderland to the inebriated eye. In many ways, this would be similar to a child's play park, but there are several noticeable differences. Every wall/corner would have a sick bucket in it, for the inevitable vomiting. Many urinals (as well as toilets for the more phallically challenged users) would be dotted around the place. Of course, the floors would all be very soft to cushion the frequent falling.

There would be a bouncy castle area, conveniently with the highest density of sick buckets nearby and several TV screens showing such colourful yet thought-provoking fare as the Tellitubbies or Barney the Dinosaur. There would also be an entire area filled with traffic cones so that the drunk users don't get cold heads.