h a l f b a k e r yThe embarrassing drunkard uncle of invention.
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Geeks need to exercise more, or we'll all be dead by Tuesday.
Geeks will not exercise.
Geeks who do try to exercise are confused by heartrate monitors. What is a good value for blood pressure anyway ? I checked in the Haynes manual, and 400psi is perfectly OK for my Citroen, so it ought to
be good for me too ?
Geeks will listen to very few people. Douglas Adams is one of the very few acceptable to almost all geeks.
So, I present the Douglas Adams Memorial Exercise Incentivizer. A small plastic book-like device, with all manner of sophisticated body-probing and fitness metrological technology inside and a simple display on the cover. It reads, in large friendly letters, either "Don't Panic" or "Panic Now", according to your urgent fitness requirements.
A simpler version may be produced for the Ayn Rand readers. It says simply "Exercise Harder !" at all times. By avoiding the need for complex internals, it's thus cheaper to make and more efficient. With luck, we might even see a few of its users spontaneously combust.
Douglas Adams Memorial
http://www.halfbake...s_20Adams_20Memoria
More memorial musing muted here [Aristotle, Oct 24 2002, last modified Oct 17 2004]
[link]
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"sophisticated body-probing" Ooh! Can I do that bit, please? [blissmiss, you're up first!] |
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The L. Ron Hubbard version: "Exercise now, or I'll
electrocute you with this tomato!". |
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Welcome dingbat, aside from the WIBNI aspects of the
idea I like it a lot. A fitting tribute to Doug (who I managed
to piss off when he came to Australia a few years ago). |
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You are aware I presume, Douglas Adams died on a treadmill? The incentive therefore being, 'Programmer, chill thyself'? |
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I would prefer a copy of the "Procrastinators Guide to the Galaxy" which has on the front "Don't Exercise" ;-). |
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Exercise now, before it starts reciting poetry... |
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The "Eccentrica Gallumbits Aerobics Workout Video" would probably be a good seller, mind ...... |
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The Stephen King version: "Run! There's something behind you!" |
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Don't forget to bring a towel. To clean off the sweaty exercise equipment, of course. |
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Perhaps madradish could provide some select phrases uttered by Douglas Adams when pissed off. These could be used to make the "Douglas Adams Exercise Invectivizer", which screams things like "You fat bloated TOAD!" or "you jiggling, pudgy, pudding-assed TURD!" at deconditioned nerds. |
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at what age do couch potatoes realize they need more exercize?......42! |
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or a robot could be "your personal trainer, who's fun to be with" |
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Hey arthur! don't just lie there in front of the yellow buldozers....do some sit-ups while you're down there! |
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at least the gulga-frinchens jogged. |
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the ed mcmahon version, "you may already be exercising". |
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Well, to be honest he didn't really utter any memorable
phrases. He just kinda glared. I think he was tired. I didn't
know that he died on a treadmill, that's quite weird. |
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