Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Do-it-yourself amputation kit

Do It Yourself Amputation Kit.
  (+4, -3)
(+4, -3)
  [vote for,
against]

There have been several news stories concerning people who have been trapped in by large boulders or parts of their car and had to slowly cut through their limb with a pocket knife, shard of glass or other sharp thing that just happens to be laying around.

Sawing through one's own limb for survival is a skill that I think few people possess. What the everyman needs is a portable guillotine type of device to make the cut cleanly and quickly. While I don’t think I could slowly cut through my limb with a pocketknife, I do think I could do it in one swell foop, so to speak.

The device should be compact and light enough to carry in a backpack. I imagine an assemble able device with a band to hold the limb in place and a razor sharp cutting device with a leveraged actuator allowing you to make a small movemant and have the blade go cleanly through the affected limb. Ideally the DIYAK would include one shot of your favorite anaesthetic (thank you [po]) and a one-handed tourniquet (thank you [DrCurry]).

I guess you could also just carry a flare gun or a cell phone... But where's the fun in that?

ato_de, May 02 2003

this idea may have taken off, if [ato]'s idea had been around http://www.halfbake...20wedding_20fingers
[po, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 05 2004]

Well, duh http://www.psara.co...sletter03_21_03.htm
[Scroll down on right, under heading "Darwin Award Nominee."] [DrCurry, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 21 2004]

(??) Much more importantly http://www.armymedi...2-11/tourniquet.htm
...the one-handed tourniquet, now saving lives in Iraq, and very handy if you ever need to cut off your arm without medical assistance. [DrCurry, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 21 2004]

climber pinned http://www.cbsnews....al/main551979.shtml
[ato_de, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 21 2004]

fisherman trapped http://www.gospelco.../odb-01-12-95.shtml
[ato_de, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 21 2004]

Link for [BaconBrain] http://www.answers....opic/apotemnophilia
some people like to cut off their own body parts. [Freefall, Aug 02 2005]

Kiwi Sandals http://www.kiwisandals.com/lee.htm
I bought some sandals (style #41) from this guy (when he still had two arms). They are very good sandals. [hippo, Nov 17 2010]

Sir Ranulph Twisleton-Wykeham-Fiennes http://en.wikipedia...iki/Ranulph_Fiennes
Amputation the British way!(see the 'Adventurer' section) [DrBob, Nov 17 2010]

[link]






       Or just carry a pocket knife.
DrCurry, May 02 2003
  

       I would just hire one. for goodness sake how often would you use it?
po, May 02 2003
  

       I saw a 50 year old patent on this recently. Actually, it was a magic finger guillotine. You put a cigarette in it, and it chops it off cleanly. Then you put your finger in and, well, that was the magic part...
pluterday, May 02 2003
  

       I have been unsuccessfully trying to find the story of the man who chopped off a finger under a guillotine at work and when the manager asked him how he had done it, he demonstrated by cutting off another.
po, May 02 2003
  

       po: three times at most, I would say. [In answer to your first question.] See link. [In answer to your second.]
DrCurry, May 02 2003
  

       Ugh. How about a portable set of jacks to lift the boulder off your arm? It'd get used just as often.
mayan, May 02 2003
  

       An excuse to link to the news story, methinks...
waugsqueke, May 02 2003
  

       [waugs] as I read the news story, I thought I would not be able to do what the climber did. Then I asked myself; "Self," (that's what I call me) "What would you do?" I thought I could handle it if I did it all at once instead of in pocketknife increments, so the DIYAK was born in my addled mind. I linked to the news story because without that, this is just one sick puppy of an idea.   

       [snarf] this is marketed toward those who will be away from civilization and medical assistance, climbing, hiking, spelunking or shopping at Wall Mart.
ato_de, May 02 2003
  

       you could have mentioned anaesthetic or booze for goodness sake. anyway a + from me because it *is* an original idea.   

       thank you Curry. Duh? hey you have been doing this 50 years longer than me <g>
po, May 02 2003
  

       Honest! If you'd kept looking at this page, you'd have seen that originally I posted the link as "Well, duh." Then after my "See link" post, I though it migh not be obvious that that was the link I was talking about, so I added " - for po" without thinking about any possible negative connotations. You know I love you, sweetie.
DrCurry, May 02 2003
  

       The kit should be available in left-hand and right-hand versions.
DrBob, Jun 02 2003
  

       Ambidextrous would be better, it wouldn't matter which hand you trapped.
OnionBread, Jun 02 2003
  

       There should also be versions than can be operated by foot, in case both arms are trapped.
DrBob, Jun 02 2003
  

       or the mouth which would bring the possible self-usage up to 4.
po, Jun 02 2003
  

       //or the mouth which would bring the possible self-usage up to 4.//   

       <*Evil*>If you were a bloke, I reckon you could bring that up to five </*Evil*>
froglet, Jul 30 2005
  

       [froglet] Ow!   

       Not that this portable guillotine isn't a good idea, but wouldn't it be safer if, before going out into the woods, you went to a nice, clean hospital and had everything amputated?
baconbrain, Jul 31 2005
  

       [baconbrain] - I doubt the doctors would do that. There is a psychological disorder where you get some kind of weird sexual high from having a limb removed - I'm trying to find a link, but then again, I'm not sure if I actually want to google it...
froglet, Jul 31 2005
  

       "This is a tricky one, inspector. There appears to be a man's head wedged between those two boulders up there, and as you can see there's a bizarre metal device next to this body here..."
Basepair, Jul 31 2005
  

       HA Ha! I'll guarandamntee you there's a writer who's devised a take on that [Basepair].
reensure, Aug 01 2005
  

       Baked: Boltcutters.
Noexit, Aug 01 2005
  

       [Baconbrain]: see link.
Freefall, Aug 02 2005
  

       Um, thanks for the link, I guess.
baconbrain, Aug 05 2005
  

       eww. just ewww.
moPuddin, Aug 05 2005
  

       //wouldn't it be safer if, before going out into the woods, you went to a nice, clean hospital and had everything amputated?//   

       I assume you haven't heard the *other* version of that classic song 'The Teddy Bears Picnic'?
froglet, Aug 05 2005
  

       The word "cheesewire" springs to mind.   

       In terms of compactude, the ideal would be a sort of cheesewire noose with a battery-operated heavily-geared winch to tighten it. It might splinter the bone a little, but a nailfile could resolve that problem once you're free and at leisure.
MaxwellBuchanan, Nov 17 2010
  
      
[annotate]
  


 

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