h a l f b a k e r yThe leaning tower of Piezo
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Tired of changing diapers at all hours of the day or night? Well this is just like those monkeys who help people with disabilities. The chimp or monkey fills in for parents when needed. Could also be trained for nighttime feedings. Also provides babies with cross species interaction and can provide
companionship for years to come.
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If changing diapers wasn't an overarchingly important parent-baby bonding interaction, we wouldn't do it. Would we? |
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I don't think the gorilla who fathered my children ever changed a nappy in his life. |
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Diapers - they are spendy. Lots of places in the world people don't own a pot to piss in, much less a pile of pads to poop in. Not to mention thousands of years of stone age ancestors. So my question - when there are no diapers, do babies just let fly? And what is so wrong with that? |
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Infection, for one.
But regardless I'm compelled to + anything involving monkeys or chimps |
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not for this stuff, shirley. |
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bungston: courtesy the National Geographic, yeah, basically. (Toddlers under the age of potty training - or whatever passes for potties in the relevant culture - go naked from the waist down.) |
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Mommy, Bobby keeps picking the bugs out of Susie's hair and eating them! |
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While naked from the waist down works great in the Tropics those of the higher latitudes needed to find a better solution. The Inuit use a moss/seal skin combo, Native Americans used a variety of plants, milk weed, reeds, in addition to animal skins. In Europe the swaddling cloth was used. All of these materials were changed a lot less than the 10 to 12 times a day the average newborn lets fly. Ahhh diaper rash. |
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An infinite number of monkeys changing an infinite number of dirty diapers will eventually figure out the proper way to use a safety pin. |
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If the child enjoys mashed bananas...and there is a chimp available 24-7... would diapers even be necessary at all??? <EWWWW!> |
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Chimps should be pampered (pun intended) not pimped out. They (and some monkeys)are endangered for crying out loud. Plus, adult chimps have the strength of the Hulk. Talk about shaken baby syndrome! A low-wage au pair type would be as economical and could teach the tot a language understood by more than two humans -- Mowgli and Tarzan. |
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