Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Diamond Burgers

 A Grill's Best Friend
 
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Having contemplated a certain fast food restaurant's square shaped hamburgers and not noticing anything equivilent in my local supermarket, I believe it is time to introduce the world's first diamond shaped hamburger.

At first they would appear to be ordinary square hamburgers, but upon further inspection the instructions would indicate the need to rotate them 45 degrees before placing on the grill. (This would of course open the market for diamond shaped buns, spatulas, etc.)

—flagellafella, May 05 2003

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       Look in the bulk area of the frozen foods section - sometimes they hide those castles there.
—thumbwax, May 05 2003
   

       Welcome to the bakery; come up with something better.
—goober, May 05 2003
   

       I have seen hamburgers which have been converted almost entirely to carbon.
—lurch, May 05 2003
   

       Explanation: There's a U.S. fast food chain called White Castle that specializes in small, square burgers. He wants to invent small, pre-made diamond shaped burgers by turning regular square burgers 45 degrees.
—snarfyguy, May 05 2003
   

       Man - just because he is called flagellafella you toads don't need to beat him like a redheaded stepchild. But the funniest thing here is that arthur guy and his pulsing forehead vein standing out at the stupid, worthless thought of diamond burgers.
—bungston, May 05 2003
   

       //converted almost entirely to carbon//
[lurch], yum! That's just the way I like 'em.
—Amos Kito, May 05 2003
   

       You are a poet ensure. And NO a diamond burger is NOT a stupid idea. First of all, OF COURSE the perspective changes EVERYTHING. It's all in what it means to consume the mighty diamond burger.   

       Should anyone doubt this then why not add a little something for those with less refined perspectives. Just like the cinnamon alcohol with the gold flecks you could add a little bit of snazzle with a little bit 'o gold.
—thecat, May 06 2003
   

       Sometimes an idea will unaccountably set me off as well, even if it's no worse than plenty of others. Just the wrong idea at the wrong time or something. Probably an indication that a rest is needed.
—snarfyguy, May 06 2003
   

       Perhaps in the same vein as my un-posted idea of a Dr. Atkins burger. This would be a slice of bread between two patties. Served in wax paper.

Minimum carbs, maximum fishbones.
—pluterday, May 06 2003
   

       I thought that was the diet where you're a legendary, deranged one-man rockabilly band.   

       Do you eat the wax paper, as well?
—snarfyguy, May 06 2003
   

       [pluterday] I've thought of that toO but not so perfectly as you. I've been on that diet (it works, and I think it probably a good, safe option to insulin-resistance and the glut of anti-consumer, anti-health supersizing to rhino size proportions or get screwed on the price of the still to big smallest size world we live in (soulless corporate bastards, apathetic pigs (rhinos) to the slaughter masses) but god! (if you exist & if so in what form) even if you don't get cravings and you have way more energy and your cholestrol DOES seemingly bizarrely go down (it actually makes sense to me) for a carb-loving fat girl its "like" Christ, more F*****G [Oh, goodness, I "sort of" used that word (be a lamb and pass the smelling salts) - that's how bad it is) meat, eggs, etc.   

       Translation: It's not what you miss (so much - and what little itty bit probably would satisfy if you aren't such a diehard like I was), but what you have to keep eating (no matter how good - even if you break the bank in the interests of health) by eating generous amounts (more than your income justifies) of steak, top-of-the-line beef, chicken breasts, shrimp, squid, mussels, etc. (gold-plated options on a nickel-plated budget).   

       One question: How many carbs in wax paper (a possible source of extra variety well worth pursuing perhaps).   

       Minimum carbs, Maximum edible irony. Bake me a plutoburger but hold the wax paper "under advisement".   

       I'd say more but I've said all I wanted to say AND I want this to be elegant in its simple brevity <LOL - ROTF -TIPM>
—thecat, Jun 10 2003
   

       You meant "too", right?
—(), Jun 10 2003
   

       [()] yeS! (see -honest- edit). This toO thing is becoming a bad habit. Perhaps a psychological slip of some sort. You missed my missed dashy's in rhino-size and still-to-big. Some watchdog ;).   

       Also, how about a line on the substance. Style's nice. Substance is even more so.   

       P.S. TECH QUESTION ALERT   

       How do you get the underscore under the regular brackets. Is it the much hated (in some quarters here) M-A-G-I-C. Or is there a simple, rational explanation you are at liberty to share.
—thecat, Jun 24 2003
   

       Why not go all-out and make symmetrical quadrilateral right angle burgers? Then you can put it on a croissant!
—JesseOQ, Aug 04 2003
   


 

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