h a l f b a k e r yCall Ambulance,
Rebuild Kitchen.
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A discrete flesh-toned headset sits behind your ear. It has a forward facing camera and a microphone, and a tiny in-ear speaker, and is connected live to the Dating Assist Control Centre, staffed by expert advisors.
On your date (which has been organised for you by a paid dating agent, see link),
you sit down opposite the future partner of your dreams.
“Hello, how are you”, they say
You panic, not knowing what to say or do. But, blessed relief, the voice in your ear says calmly, “Smile. Say, ‘Can I get you a drink?’”
“Can I get you a drink”, you ask.
“Sure, why not?”, they reply.
“ugghhhh....”
The voice interjects: “Relax. Look casual. Ask them what they’d like.”
“What would you like?” you say
And so on...
The service would be charged on an hourly basis. An ongoing monthly subscription is also available for clients who succeed in wooing a long-term partner.
online-dating outsourcing companies
http://news.bbc.co....gazine/10552437.stm
[pocmloc, Jul 08 2010]
The play "Cyrano de Dergerac" at wikipedia.org
http://en.wikipedia..._de_Bergerac_(play)
[phoenix, Jul 08 2010]
Jersey Bureau des Étrangers
http://www.youtube....watch?v=U8hsj_CqrOs
[Jinbish, Jul 08 2010]
Not safe for the readily offended
http://www.oglaf.com/balcony/
Penis humor warning [normzone, Jul 08 2010, last modified Jul 09 2010]
[link]
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Baked (as a TV reality show) in the UK. |
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Bit like that film with Gerard Depardieu. You know, the one with the big nose. |
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It's that one about the poet/detective in the Jersey Bureau des Étrangers who falls in love and woos a lady with a mixture of love poetry and unorthordox policing methods. |
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// poet/detective in the Jersey Bureau des Étrangers // |
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Ah, that would be "CSI: St Helier", then. |
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<Thick as a Whale Omelette, Prince George> "Sausage time!" </TAAWOPG> |
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Very nice exchange, pocmloc. What are you doing Wednesday? |
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So, you're dividing your attention between your date and
this voice in your ear? You'll look like a schizophrenic off
his meds. Well, everybody's *somebody's* cup of tea.
Maybe your date's subscribing to the same service.
Would cut out a lot of wasted time. |
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Thanks a lot [normzone] I had work to do today. |
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Sorry, [blinddriver], I'll be busy, adjusting my front door mat, I think. |
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You had me at “ugghhhh....” |
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This is an old idea, but the technology is finally catching up on it, so it is bound to be baked soon. |
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