Crisp Lanes

Pedestrian lanes are not a completely new idea, but in the case of Crisp Lanes there is one main distinguishing feature: the only people who are permitted to use these lanes are those who are eating from a packet of crisps.

This ensures while they stride forward, they can be confident that in their two way lane, they won't physically encounter anyone else who's not eating from a bag of crisps. We know there are few things worse than bumping into someone while eating crisps. It simply can't happen in the Crisp Lane.

Special undercover crisp agents police the lanes and are quick to drag away any non-crisp eating violators. Frequent lane observation cameras add to the vigilance.

In bigger cities several other lanes run parallel to the Crisp Lane, such as the Bible Lane for those carrying a Bible. In other places this would be the lane of their particular dominant religion of choice.

New specialised lanes are being added all the time, such as "The Cream Lane", where only those porting under one arm a copy of the "Disraeli Gears" or "Wheels On Fire" albums may travel. I can envisage myself in this particular lane.