h a l f b a k e r yClearly this is a metaphor for something.
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Quite a lot of land in the UK is 'common' land - i.e. in common ownership. One of the things about common land is that anyone is allowed to graze their sheep on it. With common land in London this rarely happens - generally you just get police letting their horses nibble the grass while they're on their lunch break. |
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(-) Cows are especially bad for this for multiple reasons. First as mentioned the manure is HUGE, unsightly and actually dangerous due to how slippery it is while wet. Secondly cows will eat grass right to the ground if they are hungry. I saw one program that blamed some of Africa's woes on the British import of cattle which destroyed grasslands. Lastly cows are HEAVY and will leave deep prints in soft ground. |
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This problem is much better solved with goats or even better rabbits (link). |
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Not goats. Cows will eat down to the ground, goats will
tear up the roots. Rabbits, sheep, or alpaca make sense.
The latter especially since they pick a single spot to use as
a litter box. |
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I'm actually more interested in how the //beef advertises itself//!!??
Cows with sandwich boards?
Talking packages of stew meat?
Bloody diagrams of how to chew grass? |
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The Guanaco, being the smallest of the family, would probably be the best bet for suburban gardens. |
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Locusts would be better. You could keep a small flock of
them in a box in fridge (where they will be dormant), then
release them onto the lawn at appropriate times. They
would have to be trained, of course, to return to the box
when done - that's obvious. |
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"Honey, we have to leave for the airport. Did you remember
to bring our female guanaco?"
"Alpaca."
"Thanks." |
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For Guanaco, read Vicuña. It's smaller still. |
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I'm curious whether or not this would produce less
greenhouse gases than a gas-driven mower. |
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Ruminants produce a lot of methane from their digestive system, so it' s probably worse. Plants metabolise carbon dioxide, but not methane, and methane's a serious greenhouse gas. |
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Call it the "Lawn Mooer." |
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The benefit comes if it supports a cow that would be living
anyway. |
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